CRANKY PANTS

 Today I have on my Cranky Pants.  They are not literal pants but rather a miserable mood that comes over me more often than I care to admit.  I wish they were real pants because then I could pull them off and burn them instead of having them dictate my mood for the day.

When I was married to Husband he would constantly tell me to "Just Get Over It" which sounds like such a simple solution . . . if only it were possible.  Sadly that is not the case so that on the days that I wake up wanting to kill anyone within ten feet of me or just pull the covers up and over my head for the next 24/48 hours instead I have to force myself to be PLEASANT and NICE.  Just like a good person should.

Well in the words of Ebenezer Scrooge . . .BAH HUMBUG on that.  I really do think I would be much more satisfied if I had a baseball bat in my hand right about now and could go on a rampage of smashing everything and everyone in sight.

Instead I am holed up in the guest bedroom with my "go to" mental health outlet . . . my computer.   

I AM TIRED !!!!!  Can I list some of the things I am tired of ?  I am tired of living someone else's life.  I am tired of having an old body. I am tired of doing all the thinking. I am tired of not being able to eat what and when I want. I am tired of not being able to watch what I want when I want.  I am tired.  I am tired of NOT being single.  Stupid stupid me.   

Are you tired of listening to this crap???  Or do you sometimes feel the same way.  Am I alone in this ?  

I think I have a very strong faith and I wholly and completely believe that The Lord has put me where He wants me to be. I DO believe that.  I don't think our lives are random.  I believe that we are guided by God to do His will.  IF we choose to do so is our choice.  I talk about this to God A LOT !!  He pats me on the head, gives me enough strength to get through that moment and we move on.  

I'm not sure a pat on the head is enough today.   I may have to enlist the help of God's second's in command    . . .  JIM BEAM or JACK DANIELS .     I'll let you know how that works out.