Or wait . . . did I mean Desert ? I always get those two words mixed up. Desert / Dessert ? Which one is sand and which one is food ?
No I got it right. I meant the food one. Well, actually I mean to say that I am wandering through the desert of loss and my journey is taking me past every dessert there is. It seems that I am finally coming to terms with Ger's death and in doing so I am eating all the goodies I can find, like that will help.
I woke up early today, actually I woke up again and again and again so I finally GOT up at 7:09 this morning. ME, NOT SLEEP ?????????? Unheard of ! But considering the stuff that is filtering into my brain it is understandable. I seem to have gotten past the celebratory stage of Ger not having to fight cancer any longer and am now drifting into the, "HEY! I'm all alone here!" stage. Quite normal but in my case unexpected. I thought I had this whole thing under control and well taken care of. HA!
So being up early today I went to mass. Funny how these things work. Our new pastor said the mass and gave a wonderful homily that was, naturally, addressed directly to me. He talked about the Israelites wandering in the desert, (not dessert) for 40 years. Our pastor was saying how this always baffled him because when you look on a map Jerusalem is not that far from Egypt so to be lost and wandering for FORTY years really took some effort. He said that at most, without ever asking for directions you might get lost for a year, but 40? That's just insane ! UNLESS . . . The Jews just weren't paying attention to GOD ! (Sound familiar?) Here was God talking to them, telling them what to do and yet they just didn't listen. (At this point of the sermon I 'm beginning to get the message.)
All of us, at some point in our lives, get wandering through our own deserts. (With or without eating all the dessert that we can and we wander around.) There are all sorts of deserts; depression, pain, loss, loneliness, anger. You know how it is when you have been there feeling totally alone and at a loss as to which way to turn and what to do next. The thing is, GOD is talking to us trying to help us get out of that nasty place but we have to listen to hear him. THAT is the hard part. It takes a lot of practice and patience to hear the voice of God. Not like Moses who had God showing up in raging fires, bolts of lightening and thunder from the clouds. We get butterfly whispers that are really hard to hear but the more you realize they ARE there the closer you listen and the better you can hear.
It was a tough decision to get up this morning. I am leaning toward depression where I can sleep 24/7 but I also am aware of this and so am working at not letting it overwhelm me. God sent me his angels to get me up this morning and boy oh boy, when they set their mind to doing something there is nothing you can do but go along with it. After waking up over and over all night long I figured that I would just stay in bed till noon. But then I woke up at 6:45 . . .WIDE AWAKE ! No freaking way ! I told the angels to bugger off and rolled over. I guess I dozed but then woke again at 7:09 really having to pee. That was the last straw! I knew I was supposed to get up and if I was up I would go to mass. And aren't I glad I did. Not only did God speak to me but he inspired me to talk to you.
LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN
Thursday, July 23, 2015
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
I WISH I WERE A CAVE WOMAN OR AMISH
Think about it . . . no electricity so you go to bed when it gets dark. When the sun comes up you wake up and proceeded to attempt to survive the day. No time to waste . . . the food has to be gathered and prepared and the clothes are as basic as can be. For entertainment you look at the stars in the sky or practice running from saber tooth tigers.
Damn you Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin and all you prior nosey bodies who came up with the idea of electricity. I won't even get into the whole computer age. But some how, some time SOON I need to put down the iPad, hang up the iPhone and turn off the computer.
Do you know how many hours I have wasted just in the past year ?????? Thousands ! I haven't read a book or news paper in ages. I haven't crocheted or sewed or created ANYTHING! My entire life revolves around electronic devices. If I want to bake or cook something I go on the computer to look for a recipe. No more going to a cook book to find something wonderful to make. Just GOOGLE whatever on the computer and VOILA! you are on your way to culinary heaven. I have even gotten so lazy that I no longer READ books. If I can't watch the movie of said book I just go to the library and get the book on CD and listen to it as I am driving, cleaning or painting my nails. No more heavy old book to hold and to loose your place in, either read it on the iPad or Kindle or listen to it on CD.
And should you miss something really good on TV and forget to record it, just look it up on the computer and watch it any time you want.
A typical day for me centers around electronics. I get up in the morning and check my e-mail. After that I better check out facebook because there might be photos of the grand kids or some fuzzy little kittens playing the piano. After an hour or so of getting lost in cyberspace I go get the paper to read on my iPad. Why have to sit to read a messy ink stained paper when I can take my iPad out on the lanai and have breakfast and check out today's news. If I"m lucky there will even be a video or two included in the news stories. I just love videos! From there I check my iPhone to see if anyone has sent me a message. Heaven forbid someone would call and actually talk to me and get all their questions answered in a few sentences. Instead we will text back and forth for 40 minutes and still not be sure if I am picking them up or vice versa. At that point my phone is ringing and I have a FACE TIME call from KK and Finn. Those are the best part of electronics! Being able to see and hear those grand kids makes my day !! As I"m face timing the kids I walk to the mail box to find a letter from the bank which says the exact same thing that their e-mail said. They need some sort of information from me ASAP so rather than get in the car and have to drive the whole mile to the bank I just get out the fax/scanner/copier/printer and fax them what ever it is they need. By now it's evening and I can sit and watch a variety of movies ranging from 2014-1986, depending on what HBO is featuring tonight. Since there are 11 HBO channels I have plenty to choose from and at 10:30 I need to force myself to turn the TV off and head for bed. But of course I'm not able to just fall asleep that easily so I get out the iPad and play any variety of games, puzzles and videos until my eye balls are barely able to stay open.
Now through this day I have taken maybe 100 steps between the computer to the phone to the TV and back to bed with the iPad. I wonder if I could find an exercise program on the computer that would get me moving a little more.
Damn you Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin and all you prior nosey bodies who came up with the idea of electricity. I won't even get into the whole computer age. But some how, some time SOON I need to put down the iPad, hang up the iPhone and turn off the computer.
Do you know how many hours I have wasted just in the past year ?????? Thousands ! I haven't read a book or news paper in ages. I haven't crocheted or sewed or created ANYTHING! My entire life revolves around electronic devices. If I want to bake or cook something I go on the computer to look for a recipe. No more going to a cook book to find something wonderful to make. Just GOOGLE whatever on the computer and VOILA! you are on your way to culinary heaven. I have even gotten so lazy that I no longer READ books. If I can't watch the movie of said book I just go to the library and get the book on CD and listen to it as I am driving, cleaning or painting my nails. No more heavy old book to hold and to loose your place in, either read it on the iPad or Kindle or listen to it on CD.
And should you miss something really good on TV and forget to record it, just look it up on the computer and watch it any time you want.
A typical day for me centers around electronics. I get up in the morning and check my e-mail. After that I better check out facebook because there might be photos of the grand kids or some fuzzy little kittens playing the piano. After an hour or so of getting lost in cyberspace I go get the paper to read on my iPad. Why have to sit to read a messy ink stained paper when I can take my iPad out on the lanai and have breakfast and check out today's news. If I"m lucky there will even be a video or two included in the news stories. I just love videos! From there I check my iPhone to see if anyone has sent me a message. Heaven forbid someone would call and actually talk to me and get all their questions answered in a few sentences. Instead we will text back and forth for 40 minutes and still not be sure if I am picking them up or vice versa. At that point my phone is ringing and I have a FACE TIME call from KK and Finn. Those are the best part of electronics! Being able to see and hear those grand kids makes my day !! As I"m face timing the kids I walk to the mail box to find a letter from the bank which says the exact same thing that their e-mail said. They need some sort of information from me ASAP so rather than get in the car and have to drive the whole mile to the bank I just get out the fax/scanner/copier/printer and fax them what ever it is they need. By now it's evening and I can sit and watch a variety of movies ranging from 2014-1986, depending on what HBO is featuring tonight. Since there are 11 HBO channels I have plenty to choose from and at 10:30 I need to force myself to turn the TV off and head for bed. But of course I'm not able to just fall asleep that easily so I get out the iPad and play any variety of games, puzzles and videos until my eye balls are barely able to stay open.
Now through this day I have taken maybe 100 steps between the computer to the phone to the TV and back to bed with the iPad. I wonder if I could find an exercise program on the computer that would get me moving a little more.
Sunday, July 19, 2015
WHAT TO KEEP AND WHAT TO THROW AWAY
As a wise friend once told me when I bought the house in Florida, "Don't shit it up!".
Do you realize how profound those words are ? I have written about this before but now I have a friend who is "redecorating" my home. We are not spending money on anything NEW just working with what I have here. Rearranging and reworking all that is here. (I confess I have spent about $150 on a new area rug and some new accent pillows but that's been the extent of the buying.)
Not only has Carol given me and my home new life but she has provided me with a new web site where I can sell all the crap that I no longer want.
There lies the problem! What don't I want? Everything! What am I willing to part with? Nothing!
OY !
The days Carol was here my garage filled up to the brim with "No longer needed" stuff. My home looks fabulous without all the clutter and "junk" but now I am left with cleaning the garage once again.
Just ask Grand son Finn where Grand ma is and he will tell you I am "digging out the garage". Papa Danny used to ALWAYS be "Getting Organized". It's only fitting that as his daughter I should eternally be doing my version of his getting organized by, "Digging Out". It's an endless battle.
So today I ventured into the garage. My back is so tight from inactivity that I need to move. I put on my back brace, took some muscle relaxants and opened the door to my nine circles of Hell, otherwise known as THE GARAGE! Being a room, rather than an actual garage makes it so much more necessary to keep the place in order. Basically the grand kids and I are the only people who ever dare to enter this area but it calls to me when it gets really messed up. And right now MESSY is way too mild a word for the condition of this space.
Adding to the normal clutter and recycling bins are 6 bags of stuff that need to be sold or donated to some charity. Add to that the furniture Carol and I deemed "excess" when we moved things around in the living room and den. Place along side or, in this case, on top of the excess furniture several packing boxes that brought my new printer to me. There is a humongous brown shipping box that I will cut up and recycle tomorrow. But there is the box that the new printer came in along with all the Styrofoam and packing material. Along side that is a gigantic and heavy piece of plastic that the new area rug came wrapped in. And of course there is the old carpet and broken printer. I imagine I will sell the old area rug. It is in pretty good shape and I doubt if I will ever use it again. B U T . . . What if ?
And to just THROW AWAY a perfectly good printer that has 5 brand new ink cartridges in it . . .
Just because it stopped working and even though I googled all sorts of trouble shooting videos and none of them worked so it will probably cost me a LOT more to have it fixed than what I paid for a brand new printer . . . I just can't ! I just keep thinking there is someone out there who has the know how to fix this at minimal cost and could then have a wonderful printer . . . even though it IS about 8 years old and DEAD DEAD DEAD. (I have way too much of my parents in my brain. They threw away nothing!)
But the BIGGEST dilemma right now is do I throw away the box the new printer came in OR do I hold on to it in case I have a problem with it? And if I do keep it, how long should I keep it? And if I do keep it where the hell am I going to put it since my garage is filled !
Anyone got some gasoline and a match ?
Do you realize how profound those words are ? I have written about this before but now I have a friend who is "redecorating" my home. We are not spending money on anything NEW just working with what I have here. Rearranging and reworking all that is here. (I confess I have spent about $150 on a new area rug and some new accent pillows but that's been the extent of the buying.)
Not only has Carol given me and my home new life but she has provided me with a new web site where I can sell all the crap that I no longer want.
There lies the problem! What don't I want? Everything! What am I willing to part with? Nothing!
OY !
The days Carol was here my garage filled up to the brim with "No longer needed" stuff. My home looks fabulous without all the clutter and "junk" but now I am left with cleaning the garage once again.
Just ask Grand son Finn where Grand ma is and he will tell you I am "digging out the garage". Papa Danny used to ALWAYS be "Getting Organized". It's only fitting that as his daughter I should eternally be doing my version of his getting organized by, "Digging Out". It's an endless battle.
So today I ventured into the garage. My back is so tight from inactivity that I need to move. I put on my back brace, took some muscle relaxants and opened the door to my nine circles of Hell, otherwise known as THE GARAGE! Being a room, rather than an actual garage makes it so much more necessary to keep the place in order. Basically the grand kids and I are the only people who ever dare to enter this area but it calls to me when it gets really messed up. And right now MESSY is way too mild a word for the condition of this space.
Adding to the normal clutter and recycling bins are 6 bags of stuff that need to be sold or donated to some charity. Add to that the furniture Carol and I deemed "excess" when we moved things around in the living room and den. Place along side or, in this case, on top of the excess furniture several packing boxes that brought my new printer to me. There is a humongous brown shipping box that I will cut up and recycle tomorrow. But there is the box that the new printer came in along with all the Styrofoam and packing material. Along side that is a gigantic and heavy piece of plastic that the new area rug came wrapped in. And of course there is the old carpet and broken printer. I imagine I will sell the old area rug. It is in pretty good shape and I doubt if I will ever use it again. B U T . . . What if ?
And to just THROW AWAY a perfectly good printer that has 5 brand new ink cartridges in it . . .
Just because it stopped working and even though I googled all sorts of trouble shooting videos and none of them worked so it will probably cost me a LOT more to have it fixed than what I paid for a brand new printer . . . I just can't ! I just keep thinking there is someone out there who has the know how to fix this at minimal cost and could then have a wonderful printer . . . even though it IS about 8 years old and DEAD DEAD DEAD. (I have way too much of my parents in my brain. They threw away nothing!)
But the BIGGEST dilemma right now is do I throw away the box the new printer came in OR do I hold on to it in case I have a problem with it? And if I do keep it, how long should I keep it? And if I do keep it where the hell am I going to put it since my garage is filled !
Anyone got some gasoline and a match ?
REPLACING BODY PARTS
Isn't it amazing how modern science can replace 90% of our body. Loose a limb, we'll build you a new one. Got a joint that's not working, get a new knee, shoulder, hip. Heart giving you trouble, we can replace bits and pieces of it or the whole thing, what ever you need. Kidney ? No problem ! Stomach too big, we'll take some out, boobs too small, we can put some in. Hooray for the world of medicine and science.
So why can't they fix my brain ???????
I have tried it all. With the exception of shock therapy or a lobotomy. Although I do wonder if perhaps they might help? NO! Not even if that's the last resort.
I'm talking here about the way our brains work in regard to FOOD. I'll put this right out there folks . . .
Tonight I ATE an entire pint of ice cream!
There, I said it and I'm glad. I cannot believe I did this and yet I am not at all surprised, shocked or amazed. I am nauseous, disgusted and really pissed at myself but I am also working on this weird IN YOUR FACE attitude. Almost like my brain is splitting in two and I am telling "right" brain to "F" off and leave me alone while that side is telling "Left" brain "Ha Ha Ha, you have no control over me!"
(See, after all these years we now have the proof that I am schizophrenic.)
But here's the best part, I started a Weight Loss Program this week thanks to my orthopedic doctors recommendation. I am going to need a knee replacement some time in the near future. To make the recovery from this surgery easier I NEED to loose weight. All this makes complete sense. I am an educated woman of some many many years who has subjected my brain to all sorts of weight management approaches. Hypnosis, therapy, weight loss programs, groups, videos, audio tapes etc, etc, etc. I KNOW THE DRILL ! I have spent a lifetime battling my excess weight. Nothing has had a lasting affect.
I have spent the past 4 days keeping a food journal, which included the pretzels and one piece of candy I ate along with the salmon, grilled vegetables and make believe mashed potatoes made from cauliflower. But tonight I totally lost my mind and scarfed up one very delicious FULL PINT of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. All the while asking myself "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" but never slowing down for a moment. I even added whipped cream !
HOW INSANE IS THAT ? HOW CRAZY AM I ? WHAT THE HELL AM I TO DO WITH MYSELF ?
I seriously do not know what to do. I will go to my weight loss meeting, probably with this blog in hand and just sit there dumb founded hoping someone will have an answer for me.
Until then I need to go shopping because I am out of ice cream.
So why can't they fix my brain ???????
I have tried it all. With the exception of shock therapy or a lobotomy. Although I do wonder if perhaps they might help? NO! Not even if that's the last resort.
I'm talking here about the way our brains work in regard to FOOD. I'll put this right out there folks . . .
Tonight I ATE an entire pint of ice cream!
There, I said it and I'm glad. I cannot believe I did this and yet I am not at all surprised, shocked or amazed. I am nauseous, disgusted and really pissed at myself but I am also working on this weird IN YOUR FACE attitude. Almost like my brain is splitting in two and I am telling "right" brain to "F" off and leave me alone while that side is telling "Left" brain "Ha Ha Ha, you have no control over me!"
(See, after all these years we now have the proof that I am schizophrenic.)
But here's the best part, I started a Weight Loss Program this week thanks to my orthopedic doctors recommendation. I am going to need a knee replacement some time in the near future. To make the recovery from this surgery easier I NEED to loose weight. All this makes complete sense. I am an educated woman of some many many years who has subjected my brain to all sorts of weight management approaches. Hypnosis, therapy, weight loss programs, groups, videos, audio tapes etc, etc, etc. I KNOW THE DRILL ! I have spent a lifetime battling my excess weight. Nothing has had a lasting affect.
I have spent the past 4 days keeping a food journal, which included the pretzels and one piece of candy I ate along with the salmon, grilled vegetables and make believe mashed potatoes made from cauliflower. But tonight I totally lost my mind and scarfed up one very delicious FULL PINT of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. All the while asking myself "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" but never slowing down for a moment. I even added whipped cream !
HOW INSANE IS THAT ? HOW CRAZY AM I ? WHAT THE HELL AM I TO DO WITH MYSELF ?
I seriously do not know what to do. I will go to my weight loss meeting, probably with this blog in hand and just sit there dumb founded hoping someone will have an answer for me.
Until then I need to go shopping because I am out of ice cream.
Friday, July 17, 2015
OLD LADY TRAVEL
In spite of the fact that my body is seventy years old my brain got stuck some where back in the 60's. (Just so you don't have to do the math, my brain got stuck in my early twenties!) Some where along the way my brain stopped aging while my body just continued to deteriorate at an accelerated rate of speed. Probably thanks to the poor care it received these past 6 decades and the increased amount of alcohol during my child rearing years.
Be that as it may, my brain continues along it's merry way thinking we are still in our early twenties and still able to behave as a twenty year old might. I look wistfully at people who roller skate and bike ride, climb mountains and swim oceans. All these things might have been possible for me at this age if I had begun to prepare myself for the ravages of time. Unfortunately I have always lived for the moment and didn't give much thought to my actions of today effecting my action in the future.
So here I am with an old body and a young brain. Not such a bad thing . . . as long as my body GENTLY reminds my brain that we are not capable of doing something before I attempt to hurt myself.
I really don't mind that I can't roller skate or bike ride because my knees and hips just don't move "like that" any more and "A broken hip can be the start of a down hill spiral". I accept my age and my limitations. BUT I don't have to like getting older and I don't have to behave like an old lady!
There are some instances when I DO feel very young. One is when I am driving and another is when I travel. I LOVE LOVE LOVE to do both. Two weekends ago I drove 4 hours north to St. Augustine where I met Kyle and his family. They drove down from Atlanta and we met at a wonderful resort just outside the town of St. Augustine. We had a ball !
But as good a time as I had with the family I REALLY enjoyed the drive. I had a book on tape, drove out of my community and right on to I 95, stopped once for a break to stretch the old body and then continued on to my destination. Traffic was heavy enough to keep it interesting but not so heavy that I couldn't just fly down the left lane yelling, "Eat My Dust!". I have decided I REALLY like to drive FAST ! No big surprise there. Just ask my friends who have traveled with me and they will tell you I have a lead foot.
As for the traveling part of my life, whether it is driving or flying I do enjoy the adventure. And I am pleased to say I do NOT think I travel like an old lady! Take for example the airport. When I flew up to NY a month ago I was surrounded by the old and weary. The PALM BEACH travelers are in a class by them selves. Going through security at PBI is quite the show. You see, when I travel I have my back pack ON MY BACK, no purse, no jewelry, no high heels, no wheel chair, (Thank YOU GOD !), no carry on bag the size of a refrigerator and no questions. Everything for the flight is in my back pack, (wallet, ID, jacket and book). My bag has been CHECKED and my hands are free to take off my orthopedic sneakers. (That's the only give away to my real age. That and the grey hair and wrinkles.) I am not wearing 2 watches, 12 bracelets, 14 gold necklaces that my third husband gave me nor are my fingers adorned with rings on each finger to high light my 3 inch nails that I just had done. I am NOT talking on my cell phone or yelling at my care giver. My ID and boarding pass are in my hands and I am really wondering why these women need a purse and a large carry on bag AND a LARGE "carry on" suitcase. As I mentioned, my back pack is ON MY BACK, not slung over one shoulder so it can continue to slide off my shoulder and smack the person next to or in back of me. What is it will men and back packs??????? Firstly you almost never see a woman with a back pack unless she is wearing a uniform and secondly when men do carry back packs they always have them slung over just one shoulder. Like, is that supposed to be "cool" or something? I finally got Ger to carry a back pack after ending up carrying all his crap. I would suggest he travel with a back pack and he would tell me he didn't need one. Then as we would get out of the car at the airport he would start handing me his jacket and book and news paper and water bottle and handkerchief and wallet and hat. Suddenly I was crawling along the parking lot weighed down with all his stuff. When I finally had enough I bought him a back pack which he insisted on throwing over his one shoulder, where it would slip and slide the entire time causing him to curse me for making him bring a back pack. It's a BACK pack I would scream, wear it ON YOU BACK and it will be fine. Never happened ! Stubborn stupid man ! Gentlemen, WHY do you not put the pack on your backs ?????????
So, Here I am, at the airport, waiting not so patiently for the senior citizen parade to get through security or to find their seats on the plane and then stand in the aisle looking around for someone to put their "carry on" in the over head compartment because they can't LIFT the damn thing!!
Yup . . . my brain is stuck in a younger place and I really can't stand traveling with Senior Citizens. And by the way . . . That far left lane on the highway . . . it's for PASSING. Get your dumb old ass out of that lane unless you are passing some one. And if you are passing some one please put your foot on the accelerator so your car goes faster than the car you have decided to pass. THEN GET OUT OF THE WAY!
Be that as it may, my brain continues along it's merry way thinking we are still in our early twenties and still able to behave as a twenty year old might. I look wistfully at people who roller skate and bike ride, climb mountains and swim oceans. All these things might have been possible for me at this age if I had begun to prepare myself for the ravages of time. Unfortunately I have always lived for the moment and didn't give much thought to my actions of today effecting my action in the future.
So here I am with an old body and a young brain. Not such a bad thing . . . as long as my body GENTLY reminds my brain that we are not capable of doing something before I attempt to hurt myself.
I really don't mind that I can't roller skate or bike ride because my knees and hips just don't move "like that" any more and "A broken hip can be the start of a down hill spiral". I accept my age and my limitations. BUT I don't have to like getting older and I don't have to behave like an old lady!
There are some instances when I DO feel very young. One is when I am driving and another is when I travel. I LOVE LOVE LOVE to do both. Two weekends ago I drove 4 hours north to St. Augustine where I met Kyle and his family. They drove down from Atlanta and we met at a wonderful resort just outside the town of St. Augustine. We had a ball !
But as good a time as I had with the family I REALLY enjoyed the drive. I had a book on tape, drove out of my community and right on to I 95, stopped once for a break to stretch the old body and then continued on to my destination. Traffic was heavy enough to keep it interesting but not so heavy that I couldn't just fly down the left lane yelling, "Eat My Dust!". I have decided I REALLY like to drive FAST ! No big surprise there. Just ask my friends who have traveled with me and they will tell you I have a lead foot.
As for the traveling part of my life, whether it is driving or flying I do enjoy the adventure. And I am pleased to say I do NOT think I travel like an old lady! Take for example the airport. When I flew up to NY a month ago I was surrounded by the old and weary. The PALM BEACH travelers are in a class by them selves. Going through security at PBI is quite the show. You see, when I travel I have my back pack ON MY BACK, no purse, no jewelry, no high heels, no wheel chair, (Thank YOU GOD !), no carry on bag the size of a refrigerator and no questions. Everything for the flight is in my back pack, (wallet, ID, jacket and book). My bag has been CHECKED and my hands are free to take off my orthopedic sneakers. (That's the only give away to my real age. That and the grey hair and wrinkles.) I am not wearing 2 watches, 12 bracelets, 14 gold necklaces that my third husband gave me nor are my fingers adorned with rings on each finger to high light my 3 inch nails that I just had done. I am NOT talking on my cell phone or yelling at my care giver. My ID and boarding pass are in my hands and I am really wondering why these women need a purse and a large carry on bag AND a LARGE "carry on" suitcase. As I mentioned, my back pack is ON MY BACK, not slung over one shoulder so it can continue to slide off my shoulder and smack the person next to or in back of me. What is it will men and back packs??????? Firstly you almost never see a woman with a back pack unless she is wearing a uniform and secondly when men do carry back packs they always have them slung over just one shoulder. Like, is that supposed to be "cool" or something? I finally got Ger to carry a back pack after ending up carrying all his crap. I would suggest he travel with a back pack and he would tell me he didn't need one. Then as we would get out of the car at the airport he would start handing me his jacket and book and news paper and water bottle and handkerchief and wallet and hat. Suddenly I was crawling along the parking lot weighed down with all his stuff. When I finally had enough I bought him a back pack which he insisted on throwing over his one shoulder, where it would slip and slide the entire time causing him to curse me for making him bring a back pack. It's a BACK pack I would scream, wear it ON YOU BACK and it will be fine. Never happened ! Stubborn stupid man ! Gentlemen, WHY do you not put the pack on your backs ?????????
So, Here I am, at the airport, waiting not so patiently for the senior citizen parade to get through security or to find their seats on the plane and then stand in the aisle looking around for someone to put their "carry on" in the over head compartment because they can't LIFT the damn thing!!
Yup . . . my brain is stuck in a younger place and I really can't stand traveling with Senior Citizens. And by the way . . . That far left lane on the highway . . . it's for PASSING. Get your dumb old ass out of that lane unless you are passing some one. And if you are passing some one please put your foot on the accelerator so your car goes faster than the car you have decided to pass. THEN GET OUT OF THE WAY!
Saturday, July 11, 2015
THE SCENT OF NEGATIVITY
PEEEEEE HUUUUUUUUE ! Negativity STINKS !
Remember when we were kids and our friends told us something we didn't like? Our response, besides a good slap or punch might have been, "YOU STINK!" I do remember this being a common response to people we didn't like. If you were bold enough you might even have said this to your mom when she told you to turn off the TV and come do your homework. (In this case it was probably said under our breath and often got the response from our mom of "WHAT DID YOU SAY?")
The point is, even at an early age we realized that negativity STINKS! Literally ! There is an odor to negative people that we don't even realize is there. But our body reacts to that smell. We want to vacate the area. It's sort of like the pheromones that animals and insects produce to attract a mate.
All this was brought to my attention when I was with my Florida Friends before I left on a trip to visit N.Y. friends and family. The FF's had gotten together for our weekly session of "Enlightenment and Spiritual Growth." (This is usually accompanied by some sort of culinary delight which is adding to my physical growth.) As we entered T's home we were instantly brought into a calming space filled with light music and a scent of something that was just right for the setting. Thus began our day of discovery of essential oils. Amazing how the sense of smell can change our mood and bring us to all sorts of forgotten memories. We had a delightful afternoon sniffing bottles, (glue sniffing flashback!) and discovering where each smell brought us. As a result of all this I was sent off with three small zip loc bags each containing a small swatch of oil drenched cloth. This was my protection against NY NEGATIVITY !
Being a "Born Again Floridian" I feel nothing good about New York. My roots are there but the tree has moved and I don't care to visit any old stumps that may have been left behind. Going to NY upsets me. Old memories, even though they are good, just fill me with anxiety and make me want to return HOME to sun and brightness. I'm living healthier since moving south and have no desires to return to the North. That being said I still have friends and family there who I enjoying seeing so I pack my bag every so often and off I go. This time I was armed with GOOD smells to keep me safe from any negative vibes.
When I arrived in NY to find BFF Sharon in the hospital with one foot in the grave I whipped out my good smells. As she proceeded to get worse I started carrying my good smells in my pocket book. That's when the strange looks began. Have you ever been in an elevator with someone who smell really strange? It sure as hell isn't perfume but it smells better than garlic. Maybe it's a new type of body rub like Ben Gay? You can't place the smell and can't decide if it is offensive or not. But what you do know is IT STINKS !! I decided I better keep my smelly oils in my suitcase and just sniff them at night. Carrying them around with me was putting me in jeopardy of getting stopped for concealed drugs.
But I did stay positive and Sharon did start to improve so I guess my good smells worked.
And now that I'm back in sunny Florida I am still enjoying those wonderful oils. I bought a diffuser that fills the air with that unusual smell. I haven't had a down day yet so maybe it's working. But when the electrician who was here the other day broke into singing "Grey Skies Are Gonna Clear Up" I decided I better cut back on the amount of oil I'm adding to the diffuser.
Remember when we were kids and our friends told us something we didn't like? Our response, besides a good slap or punch might have been, "YOU STINK!" I do remember this being a common response to people we didn't like. If you were bold enough you might even have said this to your mom when she told you to turn off the TV and come do your homework. (In this case it was probably said under our breath and often got the response from our mom of "WHAT DID YOU SAY?")
The point is, even at an early age we realized that negativity STINKS! Literally ! There is an odor to negative people that we don't even realize is there. But our body reacts to that smell. We want to vacate the area. It's sort of like the pheromones that animals and insects produce to attract a mate.
All this was brought to my attention when I was with my Florida Friends before I left on a trip to visit N.Y. friends and family. The FF's had gotten together for our weekly session of "Enlightenment and Spiritual Growth." (This is usually accompanied by some sort of culinary delight which is adding to my physical growth.) As we entered T's home we were instantly brought into a calming space filled with light music and a scent of something that was just right for the setting. Thus began our day of discovery of essential oils. Amazing how the sense of smell can change our mood and bring us to all sorts of forgotten memories. We had a delightful afternoon sniffing bottles, (glue sniffing flashback!) and discovering where each smell brought us. As a result of all this I was sent off with three small zip loc bags each containing a small swatch of oil drenched cloth. This was my protection against NY NEGATIVITY !
Being a "Born Again Floridian" I feel nothing good about New York. My roots are there but the tree has moved and I don't care to visit any old stumps that may have been left behind. Going to NY upsets me. Old memories, even though they are good, just fill me with anxiety and make me want to return HOME to sun and brightness. I'm living healthier since moving south and have no desires to return to the North. That being said I still have friends and family there who I enjoying seeing so I pack my bag every so often and off I go. This time I was armed with GOOD smells to keep me safe from any negative vibes.
When I arrived in NY to find BFF Sharon in the hospital with one foot in the grave I whipped out my good smells. As she proceeded to get worse I started carrying my good smells in my pocket book. That's when the strange looks began. Have you ever been in an elevator with someone who smell really strange? It sure as hell isn't perfume but it smells better than garlic. Maybe it's a new type of body rub like Ben Gay? You can't place the smell and can't decide if it is offensive or not. But what you do know is IT STINKS !! I decided I better keep my smelly oils in my suitcase and just sniff them at night. Carrying them around with me was putting me in jeopardy of getting stopped for concealed drugs.
But I did stay positive and Sharon did start to improve so I guess my good smells worked.
And now that I'm back in sunny Florida I am still enjoying those wonderful oils. I bought a diffuser that fills the air with that unusual smell. I haven't had a down day yet so maybe it's working. But when the electrician who was here the other day broke into singing "Grey Skies Are Gonna Clear Up" I decided I better cut back on the amount of oil I'm adding to the diffuser.
Sunday, July 5, 2015
THE WONDERFUL WEEKEND
Family is THE BEST ! Especially when you're having fun together. My birthday was in April. For my seventieth birthday Kyle and his family gave me a weekend with them at a resort in St. Augustine, Florida. It's not exactly half way between us but close enough. I drove 4 hours North and they drove 6 hours South and met at a wonderful golf resort just off the highway. We both had suites complete with full kitchen and plenty of sleeping space. The suites had a washer and dryer, stove and oven, microwave, dish washer and 2 TV's ! My suite even had a balcony which was way too hot to sit out on even though it was on the shady side of the building. The place was FANTASTIC ! Huge swimming pool, basket ball courts, tennis courts, volley ball courts, (one in the pool and one out), waterfalls and a gigantic hot tub. The best part . . . FREE ice cream sundae's in the afternoon !
We met each other Friday around 1 and had lunch together then spent the afternoon in the pool. There were volley balls all over the place that you could bring into the pool so that kept the kids and I very busy for hours ! Friday night the resort had a huge firework display that we sat by the pool and enjoyed.
Saturday we went into St. Augustine and took the trolley tour around the city. It was decided that we would stay on for a full hour and a half trip around and then get off the second tour through the city in the center of town which is now all walking streets filled with shops and restaurants. It seemed fitting that we should eat Spanish food for lunch in honor of Ponce de Leon. YUMMY ! Did you know that Ponce was only 4' 10" tall and the tallest man on his ship. He also had been first mate to Christopher Columbus, then became Governor of Puerto Rico until he decided to head for Bimini to find the Fountain of Youth. He missed Bimini completely and ended up in Florida. After lunch the kids and I rode the trolley back to the car and Bridget and Kyle took the opportunity to get some exercise and walk back. While they were waiting for us to arrive they discovered there was a place close by where we could experience a drive on the beach. The sand is so packed down that you don't need a 4 wheel drive. Off we went amidst the 4 hundred other people who were heading to the beach to escape the heat and stay for the fireworks. We got onto the beach, drove 100 yards, made a u-turn and went back to the hotel. BUT WE DROVE ON THE BEACH ! I think the driver, Bridget, was the most excited about this experience. The rest of us were ready for the pool and were busy watching the huge storm clouds rolling in. By the time we got back to the hotel it had sprinkled a little and thundered enough that the pool was closed. Abby, Roman and I took advantage of this to go have an ice cream and play some ping pong and pool. The skies then cleared and we swam for a couple of hours till we were all to tired to stand. WE had dinner in the room and crashed for the night.
Abby had shared my room with me on Friday night and Roman got to sleep over Saturday night. It was great to have the one on one time with them and enjoy their company. They are fantastic kids and have so much to offer. I learned not to give Abby lemonade or any other sweets because she becomes a "CHEESE BALL" (my favorite nick name for her, given to her by her Aunt Keri when Abby was about 2 years old. It still suits her !) She gets so giggly and silly her brother wants to lock her in the closet.
This morning Kyle called my room at 8:30 to wake Roman and I so they could get on the road back to Atlanta. Abby had day camp this coming week and then next week the 2 kids are going to different sleep away camps for 2 weeks. Sure hope they have recovered from their time with Grand ma.
I enjoyed the weekend so very much and can't thank them all for treating me so great. My kids are the best !
We met each other Friday around 1 and had lunch together then spent the afternoon in the pool. There were volley balls all over the place that you could bring into the pool so that kept the kids and I very busy for hours ! Friday night the resort had a huge firework display that we sat by the pool and enjoyed.
Saturday we went into St. Augustine and took the trolley tour around the city. It was decided that we would stay on for a full hour and a half trip around and then get off the second tour through the city in the center of town which is now all walking streets filled with shops and restaurants. It seemed fitting that we should eat Spanish food for lunch in honor of Ponce de Leon. YUMMY ! Did you know that Ponce was only 4' 10" tall and the tallest man on his ship. He also had been first mate to Christopher Columbus, then became Governor of Puerto Rico until he decided to head for Bimini to find the Fountain of Youth. He missed Bimini completely and ended up in Florida. After lunch the kids and I rode the trolley back to the car and Bridget and Kyle took the opportunity to get some exercise and walk back. While they were waiting for us to arrive they discovered there was a place close by where we could experience a drive on the beach. The sand is so packed down that you don't need a 4 wheel drive. Off we went amidst the 4 hundred other people who were heading to the beach to escape the heat and stay for the fireworks. We got onto the beach, drove 100 yards, made a u-turn and went back to the hotel. BUT WE DROVE ON THE BEACH ! I think the driver, Bridget, was the most excited about this experience. The rest of us were ready for the pool and were busy watching the huge storm clouds rolling in. By the time we got back to the hotel it had sprinkled a little and thundered enough that the pool was closed. Abby, Roman and I took advantage of this to go have an ice cream and play some ping pong and pool. The skies then cleared and we swam for a couple of hours till we were all to tired to stand. WE had dinner in the room and crashed for the night.
Abby had shared my room with me on Friday night and Roman got to sleep over Saturday night. It was great to have the one on one time with them and enjoy their company. They are fantastic kids and have so much to offer. I learned not to give Abby lemonade or any other sweets because she becomes a "CHEESE BALL" (my favorite nick name for her, given to her by her Aunt Keri when Abby was about 2 years old. It still suits her !) She gets so giggly and silly her brother wants to lock her in the closet.
This morning Kyle called my room at 8:30 to wake Roman and I so they could get on the road back to Atlanta. Abby had day camp this coming week and then next week the 2 kids are going to different sleep away camps for 2 weeks. Sure hope they have recovered from their time with Grand ma.
I enjoyed the weekend so very much and can't thank them all for treating me so great. My kids are the best !
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| CHEESE BALL ! |
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| Waiting for the trolley |
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| ticket please |
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| On the trolley |
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| Still on the trolley |
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| 4th of July Snow Cone |
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| Ping Pong Queen |
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