RETURNING TO REALITY - - KICKING AND SCREAMING ALL THE WAY

It's nearly 1 AM and I am writing this now because once I return home I will probably not have a moment alone for at least 3 weeks. Husband has been on his own for 10 days and I will pay the price. He is his mother's son and has learned well the art of guilt from the Queen of Guilt. Rita should have been Jewish but was a Brooklyn Irish Catholic, which is the next best thing in the art of guilt. Husband will have subtle ways of letting me know that he did not appreciate being "abandoned" for the week. The mail will all be stacked on the table waiting my return. The dishes and laundry will likewise be waiting as will the messages on the answering machine. I don't even want to think about what the kitchen and the bathroom will look like.

I will return home tomorrow to endless stories from the news broadcasts of the past 10 days and updates of the various storms brewing in the Atlantic. I will get blow by blow accounts of what husband has done for 10 days, what he has eaten and who he has talked to. There will be a 30 second period of him asking how my visit was only to be cut short by another tale of something that happened while I was away. Things as important as the shrubs getting trimmed, the exterminator spraying the house or a neighbor stopping by to chat. All these things are of great importance for husband to share because I WAS GONE and left him alone to deal with life.

I have had a fantastic time with my friends. It has been cathartic in so many ways and my heart, soul and mind are refreshed. I have been validated in my thinking and actions. I am relaxed and open, all guards dropped and all anxieties removed. The only thing better than a friend is TWO friends. We have talked and talked and talked and could go on like this for months more but reality calls in the form of one simple phone call to husband this evening. "HI Ger, it's me." To which husband responded "Oh, I thought you forgot to call". I was calling because I wanted to talk to husband, NOT because I was supposed to call. I was immediately transported back to where I was 10 days ago when I left FL. My hands and teeth are clenched, I'm starting to get a headache and my stomach hurts.

WELCOME HOME !