GOD HAS A PLAN ?

Yea, Yea,  that's the story I give everyone and, in fact, do actually believe myself.    SOMETIMES!

I met with my book club ladies this morning and we went over a couple of chapters in the spiritual weight loss book we are working on.  When I am with these women I am FIRED UP !  Anything and everything seems possible. God has a plan for our lives. We are not in control, God is . . .
BLAGH . . . BLAGH . . .  BLAGH . . .  And the horse you rode in on !

One of the passages we read today suggested finding a quiet place to meditate. Sit very quietly, close your eyes, envision a peaceful, quiet setting and just breathe. As you are doing this envision God filling you with love. Isn't that just beautiful? Can't you just feel yourself calming down as you do this?

Every time I closed my eyes and tried to picture this I also pictured the door crashing open and Husband plowing in talking a mile a minute about Fox News or making one of his REALLY annoying noises. Have I told you about the assortment of sounds this man has taken to making? He burps and grunts and HUFFS.  I think I have written about the huffing but it is getting louder and more frequent. It is like he can't move without releasing air in a MOST ANNOYING manner. I am about to jump up and punch him in the stomach just to get all the air out of him. Picture a woman in labor doing Lamaze breathing . . .  that is H ALL THE FREAKING TIME !!

God has a plan . . .  I think his plan is for me to completely loose my mind, be committed to an insane asylum so I can work with the other poor crazy folks.  IS THAT YOUR PLAN, GOD ?????  FUNNY GUY!  REALLY . . .

One of my fellow book club ladies suggested that God has put H in my life as a lesson. She suggested that perhaps I am supposed to learn something from living with him all these years. The only thing I have learned is some really good curse words and finger motions. I am considering taking a class in brewing poison, learning Kung Fu or some weapons training.  Beyond those lessons I'm just not getting it!

It is a daily battle here to keep my temper in check and not leap across the room to beat the living crap out of the man. We have all the reasons why H's brain is not functioning as it could/should but there is nothing telling me how to remain calm and carry on. Some days are better than others but recently things are just getting soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo hard to smile at and ignore.
And if the man makes ONE MORE sarcastic remark about me I am afraid God's plan will involve a one way ticket to the hospital for Husband.