Glad To Be An American

I think I am living in the twilight zone. You cannot imagine how strange this country is. And we are speaking the same (not really) language. The longer we are in England the more I am missing America. YES, we are spoiled, over indulgent, living beyond our means, living in excess and always rushing around and I miss every thing about it!
Our days here are falling into a routine now that K&B are in the Ukraine. Abby went to school, came home, ate dinner and went to bed. (K&B are doing great but missing their little girl. They called tonight to say good night to Abby just before she went to bed and she ended up in tears and I think the 2 of them were close behind.)
But she is asleep now and we will continue to try to keep things as normal as possible. Not an easy task here in the UK for 2 American Senior Citizens. (Make that one senior citizen, the other one is totally oblivious of anything and everything around him.) The novelty is wearing off for me and the reality of living in an Old World country is settling in. We met a man in Salisbury who matter of factly informed us that English men HATE Americans. Well, guess what, I'm not to fond of you either old chap. This country is living about 200 years in the past. The whole country seems to have gotten stuck in another century. To start with, it is DIRTY over here. Buildings and roads are old and dirty and worn looking and to go along with that the Brits seem to think that when you have garbage the best thing to do with it is drop it where ever you are. There is litter EVERY WHERE ! Roads, side walks, yards, highways. It is one huge litter box. As I have mentioned the roads are no where near straight and direct, everything goes in circles and twists and turns.
It takes twice as long to go a mile away because you are actually traveling 3 miles because there is no direct route. But that doesn't matter because every thing else in the country takes forever. The washer and the dryer in this house are new and take about an hour and a half to complete their cycles. The washer is so small that you can wash one set of sheets and a towel at a time. Then before you can dry the clothes the dryer has to be emptied of water from its previous load. The dryer doesn't vent so it collects all the moisture from the clothes it is drying. You have to empty the tank before you do the next load or the clothes will never dry. And forget the settings on appliances, you need to be able to read Egyptian Hieroglyphics in order to set the machines. There are wiggly lines, pictures of fans, straight lines and various combinations of all. The first try at cooking dinner, washing and drying clothes and dishes I had no idea of where to begin. And speaking of signs and symbols, what ever happened to international road signs? There are road signs over here that I have never seen in my life. A round blue sign with a red ring around it and a red X through it. I take it to mean DON'T do something but I can't figure out WHAT I'm not supposed to do. This sign will appear in the middle of the block. Got me!
I think I am just missing home and all the things we take for granted, Large cars for one. Cars that you can get in and out of without pulling a muscle. Large and efficient appliances that do a great job in a short amount of time. Comfortable beds and furniture, a dozen stores to choose from when you want to shop, grocery stores that have an entire aisle filled with canned fruit or vegetables. Publix bakery! (Even though I am loving the pastry here) And what I am missing the most is talking to people who don't sound like they are bloody English. The accents are no longer entertaining and quaint. I want to have a conversation with someone who doesn't sound like they are Hugh Grant or James Bond. I am about to strangle Ger if he says "Ellooooo" one more time.