Apparently I must be very very dumb and not at all capable of conducting my life on my own. I didn't think I had dementia yet and I didn't think I was all that dumb but it seems that I cannot survive without the assistance of the telephone telemarketer.
It appears that if I am left on my own to make any decisions in my life I will crash and burn and die within the week. This assumption comes from the number of telephone calls I receive each day telling me my warranty on my car is ABOUT to expire. Judging from the note of panic and impending doom in the voice of the person on the other end of the phone I MUST act immediately or there will be a cataclysmic explosion of such vast proportions that not a single living thing will survive the lapse of my automobile warranty. I would be more than happy to reassure the voice on the phone that I have not had a warranty contract on my car for the past eight years but the voice never seems to take a breath to let me say anything. The voice DOES tell me that if I wait until the end of their sales pitch I CAN press one, (or nine or forty seven) and I will be removed from their list and this will be THE VERY LAST phone call I will EVER receive from them. They actually make it sound as if I should be very sad and upset that I will never hear from them again but no matter how many times I press one, (or nine or forty seven), they continue to call me each and every day. Sometimes they even call me several times a day !
I have tried blocking the numbers, (each time it is from a different number), but nothing works. The telemarketer recording knows just how stupid I am and they know I really need to have that warranty on my car even though I sold my car four years ago. (Not really but I bet that wouldn't stop the calls either.)
Now it also seems that the auto warranty people are in touch with the solar energy folks who now insist that I NEED to instal solar panels on the roof of my home. This can all be done either before, after or in conjunction with the home security system that I NEED to have installed. They are also working closely with the window company and the roofer both of which are trying to keep me up to date on what I need to do immediately. Once again the voices on the recordings do not care that I do not OWN my home so therefore I will not be making any changes to the operating system of my residence. They just keep calling because they know better than I do exactly what I need to do to make my life safe and secure.
What would I ever do without these concerned individuals ? For one thing I would be taking an UN-INTERRUPTED nap each and every afternoon. It seems that not only am I too dumb to know how to stay alive without warrantees but I am also not allowed to put my feet up each afternoon for a much needed rest. Don't they know that people with potential dementia need a nap every day? Without fail if The Man goes into the bedroom to take a nap one of our phones WILL ring and the voice on the other end of the phone will be a recording with an alarmed voice panicked because the warranty on my eight year old car has expired.
But this is not the only concern for my mental ability to think on my own. After four years The Man is beginning to show his true colors and is showing what a "Control Freak" he really is. (Is it possible for two control freaks to cohabitate? ) My assumption is that having spent his entire life in the military he is used to giving orders. Because our relationship was "new" he has kept himself under control but this week his son came from Alaska for a two week visit and I am seeing a totally different person in The Man. (Well, to be honest I have seen this side of him but I have just ignored it or "dealt" with it and he has backed down with me.) With his poor son The Man is reverting to his "Drill Sargent" dad personality and his son and his girl June and I are having quite a few good laughs behind The Man's back. What is it about father's and sons anyway ? Husband used to drive my youngest son NUTS because Husband thought my son couldn't think for himself. (My oldest son was super smart and would retreat to his room every night thus avoiding any and all confrontation.).
But father's apparently think that even though their sons are on the slide toward fifty years old the "boys" still can't do ANYTHING without fatherly direction and advice. The son is probably not only capable doing a task but can do whatever better than an expert. In the case of The Man, his son could probably live in the wilderness for ten years living off nothing but berries and grass. This particular young man will tackle just about anything and not only succeed in completing that task but will do it expertly. But The Man still needs to be in the "boy's" face telling him exactly what he NEEDS to do.
I think it must be dads who in their spare time train telemarketers.
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