I am exhausted . . . . beyond exhausted. I am already dead and just haven't had time to lay down. How 2 little children can wear down one totally out of shape grand ma in a matter of days is unbelievable to me but I am walking dead proof of it.
Some time ago my daughter called to ask if H and I would watch her children for 5 days. Of course I said, "YES YES YES" . I am now into day 3 of the watching and am ready to drown myself in a bowl of Spagetti-O's. I ADORE these kids. I would give my life for these children but they are killing me slowly and quite painfully. They have proved to me just how out of shape I am and just how much I need to get my ass in gear and loose a ton of weight if I ever plan on seeing them grow up.
Keri and Steve are on the other side of the country in the state of Washington at a concert. God love them! They owe me BIG BIG BIG for this one. Kaelin (5) and Finn (2) are here with H and I for the 5 days that mom and dad are away. Kyle and his family were here for the early part of the week so we had the 4 cousins all here playing and adding to grand ma's summer camp. All the kids are fantastic but put 4 kids ages 13-2 in a house with 6 adults and there is bedlam. Everyone has their own way of doing things and grand ma gets to stand by watching her always so organized house fall apart around her. I thought I was going to go over the edge when my fridge was getting stacked with weird grains and seeds that Keri and Steve eat. Then there is the allergy free natural stuff that Kaelin can eat and the lactose free yogurt that Finn can eat while everything has to say ORGANIC on it before it can even come in to the house. And my Sponsor from OA is worried that I won't stay on program! There is nothing in this house that a normal human would eat. Did I mention I am exhausted?
I have not sat down to a "normal" meal in over a week. I have not had time to eat even if there were anything around that I would want to eat. And I am too tired to chew!
This has been a fantastic time for bonding with my little people but I think I like it better when I can get more than 6 hours sleep a night. Sleep is key to my existence. I am working on my very last nerve and have come very close to falling on the floor in a fetal position and whimpering. I have been brought to my knees by a 2 year old who looked at me and said,"I love you grand ma" in his little squeaky voice. I have played endless games of hide and seek, read every book in the house and played cars and Strawberry Shortcake for hours. When I hear that little voice in the morning calling,"Ma ma? Da Da?, K K ? (Finn's name for his sister), Grand ma ?, Pa pa?, anybody?" It melts my heart but it doesn't help the pain in my knees and back.
Did I tell you I was exhausted?
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Thursday, July 18, 2013
A REAL RAINY SEASON
TOURISTS STAY HOME ! It is summer in Florida and yet this is the time of year all the vacationers come bounding down I 95 to enjoy their summer vacation. I don't think they really think this through. It's like going from the frying pan into the fire, if you will excuse my using such and old saying. But then again, maybe they are better off down here since the rest of the country seems to be burning up at a rapid rate. How is it that we are cooler in South Florida than in North Dakota or Maine? WE are actually 10-20 degrees cooler here and loving it.
But we also have to consider that summer is the rainy season and rainy it has been. My pool is overflowing with rain, the lake is almost over flowing it's banks and hopefully Lake Okeechobee is filling up with our drinking water for the next year. Mother Nature sure does like to mess with all of us. One part of the country literally burning up with forest fires, NYC burning up with heat and humidity and we here in the South are laying by the pool in a gentle rain and cool breezes loving life. (Yes, we do stay out by the pool in the rain because we are wet any way. But as soon as those really BIG storm clouds move in in the late afternoon we head inside to avoid the lightening.) It has been a noisy summer with thunder rolling around every afternoon, sometimes with lightening and rain but mostly just the thunder. It's like there is a show every afternoon around 4. Last night we went to watch a baseball game and the sky opened just as they were starting the 9th inning. Our beloved Hammerheads were beating the Tampa Yankees 4-2 and the Yankees were about to get up for their last chance to score and BOOM, the rain came down in buckets. We left so I have no idea if they ever got to try to win.
I did hear that the ocean was quite rough these days. Besides being the rainy season it is also hurricane season and there are always storms churning up the Atlantic. Since we haven't been to the beach in over a year I can't say for sure what the beaches are like. Maybe I'll get down there with some of the grand kids next week when they are all visiting.
But we also have to consider that summer is the rainy season and rainy it has been. My pool is overflowing with rain, the lake is almost over flowing it's banks and hopefully Lake Okeechobee is filling up with our drinking water for the next year. Mother Nature sure does like to mess with all of us. One part of the country literally burning up with forest fires, NYC burning up with heat and humidity and we here in the South are laying by the pool in a gentle rain and cool breezes loving life. (Yes, we do stay out by the pool in the rain because we are wet any way. But as soon as those really BIG storm clouds move in in the late afternoon we head inside to avoid the lightening.) It has been a noisy summer with thunder rolling around every afternoon, sometimes with lightening and rain but mostly just the thunder. It's like there is a show every afternoon around 4. Last night we went to watch a baseball game and the sky opened just as they were starting the 9th inning. Our beloved Hammerheads were beating the Tampa Yankees 4-2 and the Yankees were about to get up for their last chance to score and BOOM, the rain came down in buckets. We left so I have no idea if they ever got to try to win.
I did hear that the ocean was quite rough these days. Besides being the rainy season it is also hurricane season and there are always storms churning up the Atlantic. Since we haven't been to the beach in over a year I can't say for sure what the beaches are like. Maybe I'll get down there with some of the grand kids next week when they are all visiting.
Monday, July 15, 2013
CONVERSATIONS WITH CHEMO BRAIN (CB)
I swear to you this is an actual conversation I had with H this morning. I am not picking on the poor guy but I have to tell you I am laughing a lot more.
Sitting on the lanai this morning having breakfast we are each reading a section of the paper. H has been up for a while watching Fox News prior to this.
CB - (H's new name) "Megan Fox is in England"
Me - "HUH?"
CB- Megan Fox, she is in England.
Me - Oh, Megan Fox from Fox news !
CB - Yea, she is there for the birth.
Me - When is the baby due?
CB - MID SEPTEMBER !
Me - You mean July?
CB - Yea ! Her husband is playing Polo and she is visiting her mother.
Me - Her mother lives in England?
CB - Yes, of course!
Me - I didn't know Megan Fox was English.
CB - NO! The Duchess is visiting her mother.
That was my Ah Ha moment. It takes great concentration to follow these conversations. Some days I am better at it than others. But from here on I will always think that Megan Fox is from England.
Sitting on the lanai this morning having breakfast we are each reading a section of the paper. H has been up for a while watching Fox News prior to this.
CB - (H's new name) "Megan Fox is in England"
Me - "HUH?"
CB- Megan Fox, she is in England.
Me - Oh, Megan Fox from Fox news !
CB - Yea, she is there for the birth.
Me - When is the baby due?
CB - MID SEPTEMBER !
Me - You mean July?
CB - Yea ! Her husband is playing Polo and she is visiting her mother.
Me - Her mother lives in England?
CB - Yes, of course!
Me - I didn't know Megan Fox was English.
CB - NO! The Duchess is visiting her mother.
That was my Ah Ha moment. It takes great concentration to follow these conversations. Some days I am better at it than others. But from here on I will always think that Megan Fox is from England.
Sunday, July 14, 2013
A GREAT REASON TO CELEBRATE
In the famous words of Abby, all those years ago, when she was invited to a birthday party and didn't care that there would be a pony to ride, "WILL THERE BE CAKE?"
Today there was cake, with candles and sprinkles and gifts galore. Today was Ger's 74th birthday and we CELEBRATED like never before. We started the day with going to mass and celebrating with the Lord that Ger was here to see this birthday and to give thanks for the miracle of life. After the lung cancer diagnosis a little less than a year ago we didn't know if H would be here this year. And so we had lots of reasons to be happy the old boy was still around to blow out the candles on his birthday cake. Even if he did get some help from Smith. And although I am not eating chocolate cake with chocolate icing these days I did have a couple of bites just to share in the party. IT WAS DELICIOUS!
Ger is even feeling so good as to have had 2 pieces !
Today there was cake, with candles and sprinkles and gifts galore. Today was Ger's 74th birthday and we CELEBRATED like never before. We started the day with going to mass and celebrating with the Lord that Ger was here to see this birthday and to give thanks for the miracle of life. After the lung cancer diagnosis a little less than a year ago we didn't know if H would be here this year. And so we had lots of reasons to be happy the old boy was still around to blow out the candles on his birthday cake. Even if he did get some help from Smith. And although I am not eating chocolate cake with chocolate icing these days I did have a couple of bites just to share in the party. IT WAS DELICIOUS!
Ger is even feeling so good as to have had 2 pieces !
Saturday, July 6, 2013
HAPPY SIXTH OF JULY !
Oops, seem to have missed the first through the sixth some how. I feel like the kid in school just off for the summer and looking at it flying by with me 2 steps behind. I LOVE LOVE LOVE summer. (Except that year I had to go to summer school for math. UGH, that was THE most horrid summer ever. I made sure I passed everything after that one summer of torture!)
Even though we live in Paradise and have "summer" year round it is still a psychological thing about June, July and August being summer vacation. It is nicer swimming in the 85 degree pool during the summer than the 72 degrees in January. But it's more than that. It is a state of mind that just feels so much more relaxing. I WANT to be lazy and sit around and nap in a chair out in the shade of the yard. I WANT to bring a good book outside to read till I fall asleep. I even WANT (are you sitting down?) to get up early and see the day begin in all it's glory. Summer is just special. And this summer is just brighter and lighter and just drifting by as quickly as ever.
I have been working with my new group of Over Eaters this past month. I got my 30 day chip for abstaining from eating between meals and/or over eating at meals. I haven't lost a heck of a lot of weight from my body but I am loosing so much weight off my mind. This group is AMAZING and it is the perfect time of the year to have joined. The summer heat reminds me of all these extra pounds I am carting around. I'm enjoying going out into the pool to exercise each day while enjoying the beauty of where I am. In fact, I'm enjoying everything more. Even Husband!
Is it the fact that it is Summer or the fact that I am becoming a better person or a combination of the two? Either way, Life is Good these days. Summer is here and so am I.
Even though we live in Paradise and have "summer" year round it is still a psychological thing about June, July and August being summer vacation. It is nicer swimming in the 85 degree pool during the summer than the 72 degrees in January. But it's more than that. It is a state of mind that just feels so much more relaxing. I WANT to be lazy and sit around and nap in a chair out in the shade of the yard. I WANT to bring a good book outside to read till I fall asleep. I even WANT (are you sitting down?) to get up early and see the day begin in all it's glory. Summer is just special. And this summer is just brighter and lighter and just drifting by as quickly as ever.
I have been working with my new group of Over Eaters this past month. I got my 30 day chip for abstaining from eating between meals and/or over eating at meals. I haven't lost a heck of a lot of weight from my body but I am loosing so much weight off my mind. This group is AMAZING and it is the perfect time of the year to have joined. The summer heat reminds me of all these extra pounds I am carting around. I'm enjoying going out into the pool to exercise each day while enjoying the beauty of where I am. In fact, I'm enjoying everything more. Even Husband!
Is it the fact that it is Summer or the fact that I am becoming a better person or a combination of the two? Either way, Life is Good these days. Summer is here and so am I.
Monday, July 1, 2013
KEYS PLEASE . . . "THE KEY TO ANALISIS"
(Well, here we are again at 2 AM and another sleepless night. I have been trying to fall asleep and STAY asleep for the past 4 hours and have finally given up and turned to my favorite middle of the night pass time. I have been "chewing on" this blog for a while now so I guess this is the time to get it out of my head.)
A few weeks ago I got noticing the keys people carry. EVERYONE has a key ring with some keys on it. You figure most of us have a car so there's one key. Then we have our home so that's at least one other key, possibly two if you have a side door and maybe even 3 if you have a garage door. Add them up and you are carrying about 4 keys that you need on a daily basis.
Have you looked at your key ring lately? Count the keys! I bet you have way more than 4 keys. How does that happen? Where did these keys come from and what the hell are they for? Bet you have at least one key on there that you haven't got the foggiest idea what it is for.
Now if you are anything like H you have way more than just one mystery key on your ring. But I think we need to back up a minute and take a look at the key ring itself.
H has a key ring that could anchor the QE II. He found the key ring years ago in a sporting goods store in the mountain climbing section. (Don't ask, the man has never climbed a mountain or a set of stairs in his life!) The carabiner is huge but he liked that because he thought it would keep him from loosing it. (NOT) This has been his key ring for years. Then he got sick, lost all sorts of weight and between the 42 pound set of keys in one pocket and the $14 worth of loose change in his other pocket, his pants kept falling down. He finally emptied his pockets of the loose change after he lost his keys. Problem solved. He was convinced the keys were GONE but they did show up a couple of weeks later. I knew if he had dropped them some where the 3.5 earthquake would have signaled us to their falling so I figured they would turn up. But in the mean time H bought another carabiner, a smaller version of the original, replaced the car key and 2 house keys so now he is good to go. The first set of mystery keys remains in his dresser in case he ever figures out what the other 6 keys are for.
That's the thing. We all have keys on our key ring that we haven't got a clue what they are for. They appeared on our key ring on day and haven't left since. And heaven forbid we should "get rid" of them because we may just find ourselves locked out of, (or in), someplace we haven't been in the past 30 years!
And that's another thing . . . how do you get rid of old keys? You can't just throw them in the garbage because some rogue rat or sea gull at the dump may get its paws or claws on it and track us down in the middle of the night. (Don't tell me you haven't thought that!) I just can't THROW OUT a key. There is just something wrong about that. What if I discover a hidden suitcase in the back of my closet and it is locked and I have thrown out the key? And so we keep the keys on the ring, JUST IN CASE.
But the keys really aren't what I have got noticing. It is the Key Ring and additional baubles that are on the ring that interest me. H has a tire gauge on his key ring. Has H ever checked the tire pressure on any of our cars? NO! But on Father's day our church gave all the dads a little card with a tire gauge on it. Now it's on the key ring. Some folks have religious medals, some have those little tags from the library, grocery store and other places they frequent. Some people find it necessary to put HUGE alphabet letters on their key ring so in case they forget their names they will at least have a clue. There are feathers. bones, jewels and junk but we all have SOMETHING hanging from our key rings to distinguish our selves from the next guy. And all those baubles say something about us. I haven't got a clue what they say but I'm sure some psychologist would have a field day with this.
As for myself, I actually have 2 key rings that I carry each day. One for the Rav 4, which is the "family car" and one for MY car. The RAV ring has 2 keys on it, one for the house, one for the car and the ring has 2 pastel plastic sea shells on it. MY keys are on a purple metal shark whose teeth are a beer bottle opener. Need I say any more?
A few weeks ago I got noticing the keys people carry. EVERYONE has a key ring with some keys on it. You figure most of us have a car so there's one key. Then we have our home so that's at least one other key, possibly two if you have a side door and maybe even 3 if you have a garage door. Add them up and you are carrying about 4 keys that you need on a daily basis.
Have you looked at your key ring lately? Count the keys! I bet you have way more than 4 keys. How does that happen? Where did these keys come from and what the hell are they for? Bet you have at least one key on there that you haven't got the foggiest idea what it is for.
Now if you are anything like H you have way more than just one mystery key on your ring. But I think we need to back up a minute and take a look at the key ring itself.
H has a key ring that could anchor the QE II. He found the key ring years ago in a sporting goods store in the mountain climbing section. (Don't ask, the man has never climbed a mountain or a set of stairs in his life!) The carabiner is huge but he liked that because he thought it would keep him from loosing it. (NOT) This has been his key ring for years. Then he got sick, lost all sorts of weight and between the 42 pound set of keys in one pocket and the $14 worth of loose change in his other pocket, his pants kept falling down. He finally emptied his pockets of the loose change after he lost his keys. Problem solved. He was convinced the keys were GONE but they did show up a couple of weeks later. I knew if he had dropped them some where the 3.5 earthquake would have signaled us to their falling so I figured they would turn up. But in the mean time H bought another carabiner, a smaller version of the original, replaced the car key and 2 house keys so now he is good to go. The first set of mystery keys remains in his dresser in case he ever figures out what the other 6 keys are for.
That's the thing. We all have keys on our key ring that we haven't got a clue what they are for. They appeared on our key ring on day and haven't left since. And heaven forbid we should "get rid" of them because we may just find ourselves locked out of, (or in), someplace we haven't been in the past 30 years!
And that's another thing . . . how do you get rid of old keys? You can't just throw them in the garbage because some rogue rat or sea gull at the dump may get its paws or claws on it and track us down in the middle of the night. (Don't tell me you haven't thought that!) I just can't THROW OUT a key. There is just something wrong about that. What if I discover a hidden suitcase in the back of my closet and it is locked and I have thrown out the key? And so we keep the keys on the ring, JUST IN CASE.
But the keys really aren't what I have got noticing. It is the Key Ring and additional baubles that are on the ring that interest me. H has a tire gauge on his key ring. Has H ever checked the tire pressure on any of our cars? NO! But on Father's day our church gave all the dads a little card with a tire gauge on it. Now it's on the key ring. Some folks have religious medals, some have those little tags from the library, grocery store and other places they frequent. Some people find it necessary to put HUGE alphabet letters on their key ring so in case they forget their names they will at least have a clue. There are feathers. bones, jewels and junk but we all have SOMETHING hanging from our key rings to distinguish our selves from the next guy. And all those baubles say something about us. I haven't got a clue what they say but I'm sure some psychologist would have a field day with this.
As for myself, I actually have 2 key rings that I carry each day. One for the Rav 4, which is the "family car" and one for MY car. The RAV ring has 2 keys on it, one for the house, one for the car and the ring has 2 pastel plastic sea shells on it. MY keys are on a purple metal shark whose teeth are a beer bottle opener. Need I say any more?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)