If The Man was a Native American he might have a "Spirit" name, like "Wolf Hunter" or "Flies Like Bird" because he has done both. But these days neither of those would apply so I believe that his spirit name would be changed to "AIR TALKER". The Man talks to the air CONSTANTLY !!!
I imagine he thinks he is talking to me but when he is 2 rooms away I can't hear a word he is saying yet I can hear him going on and on about something. This is an every day, one hundred times a day occurrence and I just laugh to myself time after time. The good thing is that his memory is getting worse by the day so even if he thinks he is telling me something he won't remember that ten minutes later.
I've written before about how The Man has a habit of starting a conversation just as I am walking out the door. It seems there is some correlation between my body being in motion that triggers his need to start talking. Sometimes I stop and listen for a few seconds just to make sure he is not imparting some wisdom but I soon realize he is just talking for the sake of talking. This fact is strange because we can be in the same room/car for hours and he will never say a word. The second I stand up and move out of his immediate surrounding he starts talking. It's like he needs to fill the space I was inhabiting with words.
Most times it doesn't make a difference if he chooses to start a conversation as I walk away from him. He usually lets me get into the next room before he even starts talking so it's not like I'm still in his sight. I mean, I am out of the room and around the corner when I hear him start talking. If I come back and ask what he was saying nine times out of ten he can't remember. Occasionally he will start over with what ever wisdom he was spewing but even then I am at a loss as to what he is talking about because he starts most conversations in the middle. Apparently The Man has a LOT of conversations going on IN his head so at any moment when the words decided to spill from his mouth they make no sense to me because I was not inside his head for the first three minutes of his thought. I have a lot of difficulty knowing who, "She" and "He" and "They" are when I'm brought into the conversation. Because he has been thinking about a particular person or thing he seems to assume I know who or what he is referring to when he starts speaking. One minute we will be talking about the local hardware store and the next minute he is saying something like, "They only had Chocolate and Vanilla today". Now I am pretty sure the hardware store is not selling Chocolate and Vanilla screwdrivers or power drills so I am confused. When The Man sees the look of puzzlement on my face he can't figure out why I am so stupid. It's a game for me, trying to figure out the train of thought even though the train has derailed three stations back.
As I sit here in the living room, three rooms away from where The Man is sitting watching TV I can hear him talking to me. I know he is talking TO me because even though there are times when I think he has indeed lost his mind I do know he really is all there. It's almost like he thinks I have super powers and can hear him no matter where he is. There are times when I don't answer so he will walk into the room I am in to ask if I heard him. When I say I didn't hear him he is AMAZED . . . how could I NOT hear what he was saying ???? Gee, there must be something wrong with my hearing!
Now let us take a moment here to explore the flip side of this problem. I will be sitting directly across the kitchen table from The Man and he doesn't hear a word I am saying. I speak his name to get his attention and even though he is facing me I can see that the words are floating off into space never to be heard again. When I ask him twenty minutes later if he has thought about what I said at dinner I receive the blank look and the question, "WHAT?" He never heard me speak to him and he will SWEAR I never did.
As frustrating as all this can be I am beginning to use it to entertain myself when things get too dull. I walk through the room moving my mouth but saying nothing. Most times he doesn't even notice until I am out of the room and then it will dawn on him that I must have been saying something. I naturally deny it. When I am in another room and I hear him talking I just let him go on and then two hours later I will ask what he was talking about earlier. He can't remember and it drives him nuts trying to remember what important piece of information he was sharing with me.
It's all in good fun and I wonder if anything will change when he get his new hearing aids next month.
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