Monday, December 23, 2019

HOLIDAY RETURNS

Tis the season for gift giving which only leads to standing in the endlessly long RETURN line at your favorite store.

I called my daughter two days ago and when she answered I could tell she was in her car heading somewhere. When I asked where she was going she told me she was going to Kohls and Five Below to return 2 items.  (In case you aren't familiar with Five Below it is similar to a Dollar Store but everything in the place costs less than five dollars.  It also carries items that are very different from your run of the mill junk store.  I always find something out of the ordinary that I just must have because, after all, it only costs five dollars !! )     But because things are so cheap I couldn't imagine why my daughter would bother to travel across town to return something so inexpensive.  Being my daughter she knew EXACTLY what I was thinking so she went right into an explanation.   Keri had bought something for her daughter and then found a better one somewhere else. She said she was going to drop the cheaper toy in one of the "Toys for Tots" bins but because it was only 5 days before Christmas all the collection bins had been removed from the stores.  And so she returned a $5 toy.  She did not learn this from her mother who will buy something, decide 2 weeks later that I really don't want it and will then donate it to a charity.    I HATE returning things !!!

And so today when The Man and I took a ride to visit the infamous Cousin Lu Lu  I cringed when she  "asked" me to take her to the store to return something.  Every time I visit my cousin she will have  several things for me to do. The tasks range from taking out the garbage, walking the dog, helping her do something on her computer or take her shopping. I am always rewarded with lunch out at Friendlies or some other local chain eating establishment for which she ALWAYS has a coupon. The adventures are endless and exhausting and usually give me much fodder for my next blog once I stop laughing/crying/muttering to myself.  There is never a dull visit !

 I thought I had seen it all when it came to the outrageous and ridiculous actions of my dear cousin but today was beyond anything I have experienced in all my years.  
                                     
                              TODAY  WE  RETURNED . . .  . . .  . . .   ICE CREAM. !!!

Yes, I said ice cream . . .  melted, partially eaten ice cream .

I know people return all sorts of things but I draw the line at ice cream.  In fact pretty much any food item should never be returned unless it has spoiled. There are times when you open a package of meat and it is rotten.  Or a container of milk smells awful when you open it at home.  It does happen,  and at the price of groceries these days you should take it back to either exchange it for a new item or get your money back.   But to return food that you have purchased, brought home and  EATEN . . . and then decided you did not like how it tastes . . .  THAT is not reason to return it !!     You bought it, it is yours . . . it is not damaged, it is not spoiled, it is too bad that you don't like how it tastes but you bought it !! If you don't like it give it away or throw it out but do NOT return it to the store.  By doing this you are just adding to the rising cost of food. Melted, half eaten ice cream can not be returned to the shelf for another customer to buy. It is being thrown out and the store now has had to refund you a whopping $6.  This woman has more money than God but actually took back a half gallon of ice cream because she didn't like it !!!!!!!  

When we arrived at cousin Lu's house today you should have seen the look D's and my faces when Lu told us where we were going and why.   Dwayne looked at me with the,  "You have GOT to be kidding" look on his face and I had all I could do from saying exactly that to my cousin. SERIOUSLY ?????  There, sitting on the kitchen table in a brown paper shopping bag was a half gallon of vanilla ice cream.  I don't know how long it had been sitting on the table and I don't know how any one could not like vanilla ice cream but return it we did.  When we pulled up in front of Publix Dwayne actually got out of the car to go into the store with Lucille.  I expected that he would wait in the car because walking with his oxygen is extremely difficult. I looked at him and wondering why he would make this effort to which he answered, " I HAVE GOT TO SEE THIS !"

The girl at the customer service counter did now blink an eye when Lucille handed her the now soggy bag. She glanced in to the bag before placing it in to a large plastic bag and deposited it into a plastic container on the floor.  She calmly handed my cousin her precious six dollars and went on to the next customer.

Apparently this is a common occurrence in this oasis of wacky octogenarians.

Dwayne and I will be laughing over this day for months to come.

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