Moods

Well good evening. . . Where have I been? Sure wish someone could answer that for me cause I have no idea what I have been doing that has pulled me away from writing. (If you can call this writing. I call it therapy.) I have been traveling but that was weeks ago. I have been cleaning, but that was VERY short lived. I have been eating and sleeping and, well, just plain living. You know the routine, shopping for food, putting away food, cooking food, putting away leftover food. I lead such an exciting life. (Actually I really do!) And through all this I have gone from HAPPY, to tired, to angry, to lazy, to energized, to "who cares" or as I usually say"Who gives a shit" or a "flying 'F'" depending on how bad a day it is. And that is all in the span of about twenty minutes. So you can only imagine what an entire day is like, no less a week. As a result of this I have decided I am BiPolar to the Nth degree. Now please don't take offense, I am not mocking the disorder. What I am saying is that there are a lot of unfortunate people out there suffering from this problem. They are diagnoised, put on different meds and hopefully can lead "normal" lives. Then there are the rest of us who, although not diagnosed with any disorder, are just a up and down with their moods. Blame the hormones, blame the fact that we are female, blame diet, lack of exercise, stress, you name it, we have it. The fact remains that I am as volitle as a capsule of nitro glycerine and my husband just doesn't know how to handle me. Hell, I don't know how to handle me. I think the old lable of MANIC DEPRESSION really says more than bi-polar. Some times I feel really WOOPIE good. Other times I feel REALLY depressed. But I guess that term is too politically incorect and gives one the feeling of being a maniac which is one step this side of nuts.
But politically correct or not, I AM NUTS ! Some days it is a good nuts and some days don't even look my way. I wonder about people like my husband who are ALWAYS just sooooooooooo mellow. Is he for real? I mean, I'm on drugs and I drink and I still can't be mellow all the time. What is with him? Boring !!!! So even though I am swinging through my moods like a monkey through the jungle, I am NEVER bored. Every day is an adventure cause every day I get to wake up and be totally surprised at how I am feeling. Just God help those who live with me!