UN-SINKABLE SWIMMY

Being my mother's daughter I shop in the Dollar Store.  Dollar Tree to be specific. This is the only dollar store where EVERYTHING is a dollar !  My mother was a "Cheap John's" shopper. Cheap Johns was the dollar store of the 50's. They probably didn't call it a dollar store because there wasn't anything in it that was MORE than a dollar. A dollar in the fifties was like a twenty today. And that was why my mom loved Cheap Johns. We didn't have a lot of money but my mom could make a dollar last from one month to another. You would think that as an only child I would have been showered with gifts come birthday and Christmas. And you would be right. There were always bunches of gifts for me to open. Ninety-nine percent of them came from Cheap John but being a kid I sure as hell didn't care. I had lots of gifts to open and toys to play with and that was all I cared about. To this day I equate gifts with love which explains why I am in therapy.

And all this has to do with swimmies how?

When ever the "kids" are coming to grand ma's I head for the dollar store. I HAVE to have "stuff" here for the grand kids to play with when they come. Most of the things are broken or lost by the time the kids leave but it was here to open and play with for the duration of the visit.
Now since we have a pool there is always the need for pool toys. Water shooters are big these days and we have probably gone through at least $25 worth of these things. The kids and grown ups love them and since they take such a beating we have to replace them after every visit. That and bubbles, floats and wind-up fish. If it goes in the pool we have it.
But since the 3 youngest grand kids are not swimming on their own yet I always pick up a pair or two of swimmies.  In case you are not familiar with these they are plastic triangles that inflate and fit around the child's upper arm. They are quite amazing and really do keep the kids floating. Smith's parents have gone hi-tech and bought Smith "muscles". It is a float that fits around his chest and has swimmies attached to the arms. It buckles in the back and Smith floats around the pool to his heart's delight.

Since Kaelin and Finley were coming to visit this summer grand ma and grand pa went to the dollar store and amoung the MANY other things we bought we picked up a pair of plain old plastic swimmies for Kaelin. Little did we  know that her mom and dad had purchased a very fancy pair of swimmies for her. Keri and Steve have a friend with a pool so they had been taking advantage of his hospitality during this really HOT summer. By the time Keri thought of getting Kaelin swimmies most of the stores were sold out. I believe she was in Target on day when she happened upon a, more expensive than usual, pair of pink SPEEDO brand swimmies. Knowing Keri she probably agonized over spending the couple of extra dollars but in the end she did purchase them.  This particular brand of swimmy is so fancy compared to the dollar store ones but they also REALLY WORK WELL!  So well that when Keri and family left them here and I decided to wash them before I sent them back this turned into a comedy sketch. First let me state that although this product is fabulous they STINK, literally, when left inflated. They have a cloth that covers the plastic inflatable floats. This cloth holds the moisture and when left sitting out they really really SMELL BAD!
I had Ger deflate them for me and I threw them in the washer machine with a load of towels. Being Ger the swimmies were only half deflated. So when I went to check the wash there were 2 pink swimmies floating around the top of the washer. I scalded my hands grabbing them out of the hot wash water and proceeded to try to deflate them completely. THREE times I did this. At which point I was piling towels on them trying to keep the damn things down. Upon the fourth try I realized the pink cloth cover, (which is the part that smelled so bad) could be slipped OFF the inflatable plastic!

DUH !    I'm just not capable of working with expensive items. Give me those dollar store pieces of crap that I can throw out and I'm good to go!

A DULL DAY

Dull is good !   Any more excitement around here and I may have to sneak away to an island in the Bahamas.  OOOOOOoooooo,  doesn't that sound wonderful !

All is going smoothly for the week, as the roof falls in.  ( I know better to say things like "All is well" and "It just can't get any worse") But it has been a very nice quiet week.  Ger is feeling and looking great and if we didn't know better we wouldn't have a care in the world.

We have had our laughs - The coffee pot remains the best but little Smith gave us a chuckle or two also. It seems that mom and Smith were driving home yesterday afternoon and they got discussing NAMES. Now just because our little man is only two don't think you can't have a conversation with him.  This little guy LOVES to talk! Mom and he got talking about mom's name being Kristen and Daddy's name being Kent. So naturally the discussion went on to Grand ma and Grand pa.  It seems that Smith thinks grand ma's name is "POOL" and grand pa's name is "HEY".  Pool is pretty self explanatory but Hey does deserve an explanation.  When ever grand pa is around he always sneaks up to Smith and says "HEY" in a deep gravely voice. It never fails to make Smith giggle so naturally grand pa's name is HEY!  WE will see these guys this weekend with a possible trip to Lion Country Safari to reward Smith for getting his behavior chart almost filled.

As for the two in England, Abby broke her foot the day of her return to Windsor. They had gone to the "Pirate Park" and Abby decided to jump from the pirate ship to the ground.  A distance of about 6 feet. Landed on her foot and broke the bone in the middle of her foot. She is in a cast from the tip of her toes to her knee. School starts next week so it should be interesting how she will manage that. Kyle says she couldn't manage crutches so she has a bright green walker. Roman is just shaking his head and carrying on as usual.

In Maryland Kaelin has started soccer practice for her team THE GRASSHOPPERS. Keri says she looks like a grasshopper when she is out there running in circles. But she sure does take a great picture.

FOLLOW UP TO YESTERDAYS BLOG

This photo arrived in Ger's email from our darling daughter Keri.  The caption says,

"I'VE BEEN WONDERING WHY I HAVEN'T BEEN GETTING PAID.  MAYBE THIS ISN'T WHERE I'M SUPPOSED TO SIGN IN"

GER BEING GER

I have to admit that once the doctors decided to give Ger an MRI of the brain we really did wonder what, if anything, they would find. A tiny tiny under sized bit of grey matter ? Empty space?  Cotton Fluff ?  A REAL BRAIN ?  Impossible. But sure enough, there it was, a full size brain.  Granted it is still a MALE brain, which immediately lets you know it is odd, but it is indeed a brain. The fact that there are spots of cancer taking root there is not a good thing but at least they are found early and are being radiated daily for the next 2 weeks.

Radiation . . .  started on Monday after our meeting with the radiation oncologist a couple of times last week. Dr. Herold seems to be very intelligent and we like him because he thinks for himself and goes "Outside The Box" in his thinking. After discussing our plan of attack Ger was brought in to have a "mask" made that would anchor him to the "table" so that the radiation can be directed at the spots of cancer in his brain. The technology is AMAZING !  Ger and I are both fascinated by this entire process. The radiation only takes 5 minutes each day and so far Ger is not having any side effects.

BUT . . .   We really had hoped that the radiation just might make Ger a little bit smarter. I am sorry to report that this is not the case so far. Ger continues to be Ger.
On Monday, the first day of radiation we went to the cancer center together and Ger took his "RADIATION ID CARD" out of his wallet, scanned it at the desk and was promptly called in for his first session.
Yesterday I sent Ger off on his own and he surprisingly found the cancer center without a problem. In he went with his ID card and proceeded to take it to the desk and scan it at the COFFEE MAKER !
You know those Kurig coffee machines that have a spout on them . . . there stood my husband holding his ID card under the spout of the coffee machine and wondering why it wasn't scanning. The girls at the desk were watching this whole thing so when Ger realized what he was doing he turned to them and made some comment about not getting any coffee from his card scan. I think that was when the 2 girls fell out of their chairs laughing.
AND GER CAME HOME TO TELL ME THIS !  You know it was too good to let go by so now the entire family knows about "dad and the coffee machine" and the jokes are flying. Keri sent Ger a picture on his IPAD today.  It showed a coffee machine and the caption, "no wonder I haven't gotten any pay checks yet".

If all it takes to beat cancer is a good laugh every day we got this BEAT BIG TIME !

TAKING A DEEP BREATH

Thank goodness for Hurricanes !   They keep us home and I am forced to catch up on all the things I have been putting off for the past couple of months.  I LOVE stormy weather.  As I sit here it is  pouring rain as it only can in Florida. Rain so hard that at times we can't see across the back yard. In between it is just pouring and the wind is blowing so hard that the rain actually seems to be coming side ways rather than down.  And I love this !  I get into cooking and cleaning mode when the weather is like this. I have a crock pot full of chicken stewing away for chicken and dumplings for dinner and I am trying to refrain from baking. So I will turn to the computer instead.

AS for taking a deep breath, it feels good to have our house back to ourselves and our lives back in our hands.  Contrary to popular belief Ger and I are not yet senile or even close to demented. It has been a hell of a couple of months for running and doing and then drop in a diagnosis of lung cancer and it is a wonder H and I have survived it all.
First there was all the travel and house guests back in March, April and May.  Wonderful travel and GOOD TIMES !  Then we had 3 weeks of family here.  I love those kids and grand kids more than life itself but truth be told it is nice when they all leave. IT IS EXHAUSTING keeping up with a bunch of grand kids ranging from 1-12.  I am totally water logged from all the time in the pool with them and my sides are sore from all the laughing and silliness that goes on. Not to mention my sore feet from standing in the kitchen and cooking. I WOULD NOT CHANGE IT FOR THE WORLD.  I always remind myself that I can sleep when I am dead and NOW is the time to enjoy life. The grand kids are growing up so fast I have to take every minute I can get to play with them. Even if it means having a house that looks like a tornado has hit it. I am also missing several cooking utensils that have been put away by my helpers, never to be seen again. If anyone knows where my microwave bacon pan is I would love a heads up!

So now it is time for a new path and we will start it with a HUGE DEEP BREATH! Tomorrow H starts radiation on his brain. That is a HUGE joke in the family as it is a well know fact that we have always doubted H had a brain. It also negates the thoughts that I have always had that H had shit for brains. There is indeed a brain up there and some of those nasty lung cancer cells have migrated into H's brain. The doctor says they are tiny tiny tiny but they are there and kill them we must before the doctors can start on lung chemo and radiation. Today is our day to breathe, tomorrow we begin to fight!

WHEN SHIT HAPPENS

I love that phrase . . .  SHIT HAPPENS . . .  From the first time that I heard it I knew it was a profound statement. Because if you are alive on this Earth you  WILL find yourself, at some point or another, in a pile of do do. That is a fact and you know it is true. Sometimes the pile of poop is LARGE and sometimes not so much. Sometimes we can refer to our problem as "The Blue Bird of Happiness" just pooped on us and some times the excrement is dumped on us by a ten ton truck. No matter how the mess is delivered you can bet it will hit you dead on and stop you in your tracks.
Most times we just shake it off and move on to the next delivery waiting to happen while enjoying all the joys of life in between.

Ger and I have pretty much dodged the flying elephants for years now. Each day we would give thanks for ALL the blessings in our lives. And we would often stop to wonder why God had blessed us so.  And blessed we have been and blessed we continue to be in spite of the giant monkey flinging poop at us.

I DO NOT believe that God makes us sick. That is what is called living. Being alive means experiencing life. And life has ups and downs, good and bad.
I DO believe that God is with us through it all and all we have to do is ask for his help to get us through the messy parts. We can either let our selves get bogged down in the muck or we can keep pushing through it holding on to God's hand till we get to the other side of the swamp.

Ger and I have our hip boots on and are ready to push through.  Hopefully we will have enough strength to keep holding on to His hand. Hopefully we will both make it to the other side. But no matter what happens we are not in this alone. God has sent us so many angels in the form of friends, family and even strangers that we are meeting along the way.
 Like all of our lives this is just another adventure to us. I am sure I will be my usual self and complain the entire time. I WILL get pissed at H and I will probably blog about it. This is my vent. It is the safety valve that I can turn to in order to let off some of the steam. I will probably be Ger's safety valve so in turn will have to let some of his steam off through this blog. Other than his sister H does not have anyone to vent to so hopefully God will give me the strength to help Ger without killing him first.  Some things in life never change no matter what you are going through.

Next week Ger starts chemo and radiation to try to kill this nasty cancer that has taken root in his lung. It seems so strange for H to be the one who is going to have to be the "patient". He has always been there for me to drive me nuts when I was suffering and healing. I hope I will have the strength to do the same for him.

WISH US LUCK ! 

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I don't know what to call this blog so we will just leave it like this.  Some interesting stuff going on here and I am not sure where to begin and where it will end.
As you probably already know, Ger, AKA "H", was just diagnosed with lung cancer. How the hell that happened I don't have a clue. I feel like I skipped a page or stepped out of the room to pee and the world went on without me for a bit. One minute we were getting ready for all the grand kids to arrive and the next minute we are in the ER of a local hospital because H is spitting up blood. NO WARNING, no clue that there was some evil mass growing in Ger's lung, just WHAM ! Go figure !
The Bible tells us to be ready because you never know when God will call and I guess he isn't kidding.
H has been fine.  His usual Pain in the Ass self as you well know if you read this blog with no complaints about his health other than a lingering cough from the cold he had a month ago. Last Wednesday we picked up Keri and her kids at the airport and when we got home Ger "mentioned" that he had been spitting up a little blood and had called his doctor for an appointment the next day. I thought nothing of it figuring it was just a tear in the lining of his throat or something from his cough. That night we went to bed and Ger got me out of the shower because he was coughing up "A LOT OF BLOOD". I told him to get dressed and off we went to the ER at 10 PM Wednesday night.
THAT WAS THE BEGINNING OF THE ROLLER COASTER RIDE that has been this past week.
The ER took blood, did a chest Xray and then a CAT scan.  At one point we were put into quarantine because they thought H had TB. There we were sitting at midnight in a quarantine room wearing our masks so we wouldn't contaminate anyone. Once the results of the CAT scan came back H was admitted. At 3:30 AM on Thursday, August 9 Ger was told he had a large mass in his lung. At first the ER doc told us there were large masses but at that point we were in shock so it didn't matter if there was one or twenty four. Things like this just don't happen to US !
By 4 AM Ger was in a room and I was on my way home to email everyone I could think of to start praying praying praying !  I cried myself to sleep at 5 AM and then got up at 8 to tell Keri what was going on.  I knocked her for a loop since she had slept through all this.  We cried and I headed for the hospital.

Since then H has had lots of blood work done along with a biopsy of his lung by a pulmonoligist. The results of that came in on Monday afternoon showing that H has a malignant tumor in his lung. The good thing is that once we got the lab results Ger could come home to be with the grand kids.

Tomorrow, Thursday, August 16, we will go to talk with the Oncologist and she will set up a PET scan that will tell us just what this mass is, where it is, is it the primary source of the cancer or has this lung cancer traveled there from some place else in H's body. That will give us a "Stage" for the cancer.
So there is a lot still to be determined and we are remaining hopeful for a good recovery from this.

The good thing about all this happening right now is that our kids are all visiting and are here with us to help get us through.

God does work in mysterious ways and we are sure he is holding us up through it all.