ADOPTION

As a kid growing up there was always one kid in the neighborhood who was adopted. He was "different" in some strange way that we didn't understand but we all wished we were him. It was so cool to think that his parents had "chosen" him. None of us really had a clue what adoption was all about but it just seemed like the greatest thing.
I have now come to realize that I still did not have a clue as to what adoption was all about. We have a beautiful niece and nephew back in New York who adopted 2 little boys from Korea, at two separate times! That is HUGE now that I am seeing just what the whole adoption process involves. To have gone through this once is one thing but twice is an act of sainthood. God bless you A&T, you are truly special people and I know your two boys are the luckiest little guys in the world.

Most of you know we are here in England to help Kyle, Bridget and Abby get to the final stage of adopting 10 year old Roman from an orphanage in the Ukraine. I looked at our 2 month journey to England as an adventure and a rare opportunity to spend some quality time with 5 year old Abby. Little did I think of the roller coaster of emotions that is involved. When we first got here things were going along as "normal", Abby in school, Kyle going to work, Bridget keeping us all under control and organized. Ger and I got to go on holiday to Stonehenge and do some touring of Windsor. THEN the envelope arrived and K&B were set to go to the Ukraine to get the adoption wagon rolling. The flights were set to fly to Kiev, a court date was set to see the judge in Kiev and the travel dates to Donets'ka were set.(This is the largest town near the orphanage that K&B could fly into. It was then a 2 hour drive from there to the orphanage.) There would be translator/facilitators waiting at each town to walk K&B through customs, into their "hotels" and to the courts. It sounded easy. IT WASN'T ! The trip to Kiev went smoothly and the city was a pleasant surprise. Modern and clean city and accommodations. Translator was right there to meet them and get them settled and tell them there was a problem with the court date. It had been postponed 2 days which would delay their arrival in Donet'sk which would delay the court dates in the town near the orphanage, etc. etc. etc. My son Kyle is truly a product of his dad and I. The anxiety that plagues us has been passed on to all our children and as soon as things start falling OUT of place that anxiety kicks in. Not only is Kyle now dealing with all sorts of complications with the adoption but the BIG JOB that brought him to England is now demanding attention that he can't give because he is being run around the Ukraine.
In the end there were delays and excuses and changes of venue. Roman wasn't at the orphanage when K&B got there but at a summer camp 2 hours drive into the country. Suffice to say K&B are NOT IMPRESSED with the Ukrainian government, towns, roads, food, people, weather (hot hot hot) or pretty much any other aspect of the country. Most of the country is third world Russian ruins. Cement block building mostly in disrepair and roads that are more pot holes than road.
K&B have spent a small fortune. Kyle has flown back and forth between London and Donet'sk to get some work done and to see Abby, all of which has set the stage for endless ulcers and emotional break downs on all our parts. Abby has been FANTASTIC! Even though she misses her mom and dad she tells us how dad has to leave again so she can have her big brother come and live with them. How any one would choose to do this is amazing to me. I am so proud of my son and his wonderful wife for seeing this through, for taking Roman into their hearts when they first met him back in December, for not forgetting that Roman deserved chance in life and for providing that opportunity at such a cost.
A year from now I'm sure we'll all be looking back on these months as a blur of emotions but I know I won't forget the respect, pride and admiration I have for this family and for every other family who has chosen to adopt. God Bless You All.