THE "QUEEN" IS DEAD

 I regret to inform you that all signs indicate the Queen of Sleep has left the building once and for all.
Instead of flowers please send night lights, computer paper or books because what the hell is there to do at 4 AM when I now seem to be waking up on a regular basis.

Yes !  You read that right . . .  ME, The all time QUEEN OF SLEEP who never rose from the depths of slumber until it was at least 10 AM or later unless there was some un-Godly reason, is now waking up at around 4AM every morning and not being able to get back to sleep.   That whole get BACK to sleep is the key to all this. I used to wake up during the night, wander the house, go pee, check on kids, door locks, weather conditions, tent flaps etc. etc. and then get right back into bed and within seconds be sound asleep again.  Not any more !  Either I have a very guilty conscience about something, am horribly upset about something, am terribly worried about something  . . .  wait, I think I may have hit about something!  But NO, that's not it because, lets face it folks,  who isn't walking around with all that crap going on in their heads. I've always had all that going on in my life so what is different now?

DRUGS !  Medication, That's what is different and once again we return to the old Just Say NO !  But we have established through the trial and huge errors of the past several months that this Queen happens to need certain medication. FACT!  So that being said we now need to find one that will take away the anxiety and depression but NOT take away the sleep.  I LOVE my sleep.  I LOVE my bed !  Best purchase I ever made was buying this awesome bed. But I digress once again.  So here I am, 
4 AM, eyeballs popped open, looking at the clock saying "Oh Crap! Here we go again."  Now that I'm awake, what should I do? What to do?  And naturally now I get thinking, "Hum, I guess I should go pee. Maybe that's what woke me." So I climb out from under those nice warm covers, (I keep the house cold at night just so I can snuggle under covers. That's part of the joy of sleep.), Schlep out to the potty, schlep back to bed and lie back down.  Now, and here's where it has all changed, my brain has caught on to the fact that my body is no longer in a prone position. Brain now realizes that Body is, or has been MOVING, so Brain starts moving also. And that's where it all falls apart.  

Unfortunately I am no longer a Zombie as a result of this new medication. (I can only imagine what you all must have thought of me all these years past while I was in my Zombie state of mind.) How could I possibly have functioned all these years on Paxil with such peace of mind and such joy of sleep? All that has been cleared out of my system and my mind is on fire with thoughts and ideas. My brain has become the Energizer Bunny working overtime to keep up with everything.
AND I DON'T LIKE IT !!!  Now I know why some people "do" drugs.  Holy cow, shut this down! This is part of the reason I started on medication in the first place!

And so, in a few weeks I will return to the doctor, once again and see if perhaps there is another alternative I can try. Until then I am reading a great book that Keri and Steve recommended called,
CRASH THE CHATTERBOX  by Steven Furtick.   Good thing I'm up early so I have plenty of time to read.