NOW WHAT ??????????

I feel like this is my life right about now . . . every day bringing a new adventure that causes me to say . . .  REALLY ???????????         NOW WHAT ???????????????

I know we all have lives that present us with this question on a daily basis but HOURLY ?  Even I find that to be a little extreme.   Thank God none of the "Now What" questions are earth shattering, mind blowing or life threatening but they do give me reason to shake my head in wonder.

First and foremost in this daily assault of my mental health, (which we all know is fragile at best), is
THE MAN .   By now you should have come to the realization that I have a problem with men in general.  Mostly my problem is that they exist.  I know God created us from their rib but I think that is about the only thing that the two sexes have in common.  It is a sick joke on us women that I know gives God endless hours of amusement.  What I can't figure is how all my best friends when I was a kid growing up in Queens, NY were boys. I never liked playing dolls with the cruel and evil girls in my neighborhood, (they were older than me and took great joy in tormenting me), but I would spend hours on end riding bikes and playing ball with all the boys. I don't know when all this changed but I think it had something to do with getting married and being put in a "submissive" roll. That whole, "Yes Dear" thing just doesn't float my boat.

But once again I digress from the topic of "Now What ?"  I think this is one of the funniest photos I have seen in ages. This winter has been a series of days/hours where I am asking myself this exact question.  Dwayne running back and forth to doctors and hospitals on a weekly basis trying to get solutions for his COPD has resulted in a daily/weekly question of NOW WHAT?  ( A hearty dose of some common sense might help but that does not seem to be an option here.) Trying to find time to do anything for myself when there is a constant distraction of house guests makes me question NOW WHAT?  ( If one more person from up North calls to see if I'm 'going to be around' I am going to explode.) My almost daily introduction of one medical issue after another ranging from minor to HOLY CRAP makes me wonder NOW WHAT?  I was supposed to have shoulder replacement surgery back in January, giving myself the winter to recover so I'd be ready to head to Alaska in June. Thanks to a series of wasted and futile trips to the Miami VA for The Man I rescheduled my surgery till March. (What's another 3 months of pain ?) Now the surgery is scheduled for this coming Wednesday but that may not happen because in the course of all the pre-op testing I have tested positive for the MRSA virus. (At least it's not Coronavirus!) I'm now treating that issue but won't know if my surgery can happen on Wednesday until I get retested for MRSA on Monday, with the results not coming in until late Tuesday.  Talk about last minute planning !   If there is a delay in the surgery that backs up all the "summer" plans which at this point I could care less about. I'm secretly hoping for a month long coma to give my mind and body a chance to get a GOOD rest.  I am so desperate for some quality sleep and alone time that I scheduled a colonoscopy/endoscopy a year earlier than necessary. It was WONDERFUL !  Good sleep, people waiting on me . . . Hell Yes!

Winter NEEDS to be over and ALL the visitors from up North NEED to vacate my space and give me some space.  I'm on total overload here and am not handling it well.  I can't seem to function at all. In addition to loosing my mind I have also lost a set of my car keys and several gift cards that I received for Christmas. EVERYTHING I touch turns to shit, dinners are burned and the house looks like ground zero after the apocalypse. The Florida cockroaches, AKA Palmetto bugs,  are dancing in glee because I am providing a feast for them on my kitchen floor.  I finally had my cleaning lady come here this past week and when she finished she left me a sympathy note.

I think I need to stop asking NOW WHAT? because obviously God IS listening and just adding on more and more until I stop asking. Instead I think I will find myself a coconut, put the lime into it and add a quart of rum. With that done I will go out onto the lanai and sit beneath this following sign and just dare anyone to enter my space.

                                                 (DO NOT DISTURB)
                                                         
                      ALREADY DISTURBED . . . PROCEED WITH CAUTION !