MARINATING SEEDS

No . . . you have not accidentally logged into a cooking blog.  It's only me trying yet again to explain to myself why men are so weird !

I have written, probably often, about PLANTING seeds in the minds of men.  When you want or need something to get done there is no way it is going to happen if you flat out say what you want. For instance, "Hey Honey, we really need to fix that door on the bathroom." A statement like that will hang in mid air for a century or more and never ripen to fruition. It's like the past couple of weeks gospel readings at church . . . the ones where the farmer plants seeds and some fall on the rocks and die, others fall on shallow ground and grow but don't survive and the ones that fall on good ground, take root and flourish.

I have found over the years that ANY seed I ever planted in the mind of a man NEVER, EVER grows immediately.According to the Bible this must be because the minds of men are filled with rocks so therefore the seeds can't grow.  Makes total sense to me !   But do not lose hope . . .  I have found the solution to the dried up seeds that I have planted.

You need to marinate them !!  

Before you plant a seed of an idea in the rocky, barren, rock hard soil of the male brain you need to soak the seed.  (Actually if you can soak the brain of the man with alcohol you will get faster results but you do take the chance of over watering and then all brain function is lost and you are back at square one.)  I am finding it is better to marinate the seeds, let them soak in the brain cavity of the man while gently watering them every so often but not too often as to drown them.   The seed will sit unattended for months just lingering in its warm void until you add a little marinate. You do this by using compliments . . . "Gee Honey, you did such a great job yesterday working on that closet!  I know how hard it is for you to do this but it really made a huge difference in this space"  This is marinating the seed you planted two months ago when you off handedly mentioned cleaning out the entire ROOM.  The room cleaning seed was planted, it sat on barren soil for months and now it needs a little watering or marinating. The man may never have even opened the closet you refer to in your marinating statement but if you tell him he did something good he WILL believe it even if he doesn't remember doing it.  (You do have to be on your toes all the time waiting for these rare and precious moments when The Man actually does DO something.  If you're really good at this you can make his trip to the bathroom to pee into an award winning task that he has supposedly accomplished.  "Hey, Thanks for washing off the sink while you were in there, it really looks good."). It is total B--- S--- but it works.

Like all things related to living with the male species PATIENCE is the key factor in making any headway.  If you plant your seed today DO NOT expect it to grow any time soon.  Marinate it for a while, water it gently every so often and when all that fails . . . Well . . .  call someone to do the job for you and your man will IMMEDIATELY start working on what you wanted him to do seven months ago.